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3 REASONS 9/29/2006
TEACHER :'dany, pls, give 3 reasons why people say
this earth is CIRCLE?
DANY :'its because my father said it so, my mother
told me so & you too just say it!
2 Comments, 40 Views,
5 Votes
,3.47 Score
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STOP SMOKING! 9/28/2006
MR 'M'  WANT TO STOP SMOKING NOW, BUT HOW?
MR 'B' :WHEN EVER YOU WANNA DO SMOKE, FIRST , FIRE
THE CIGARETTE ON BOTH SIDE.
1 Comments, 20 Views,
5 Votes
,2.82 Score
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GOD MORNING..! 9/28/2006
MR 'A' :GOOD MORNING!, THIS IS PEACE COMPANY?
'RECEPTIONIST:GOOD MORNING..!YES IT IS
MR 'A'  AN I SPEAK TO MR 'B'?
RECEPTIONIST :MAY I KNOW WHO IS SPEAKING?
MR 'A' AM MR 'A' FROM HAPPY COMPANY
RECEPTIONIST  NE MOMENT, PLS?I WILL CONNECT YOU TO HIS
SECRETARY.
SECRETARY :GOOD MORNING MR A!I AM SECTRETARY OF MR 'B'.DO
YOU HAVE APPOINMENT WITH MR 'B' BEFORE?
...
1 Comments, 10 Views,
2 Votes
,3.12 Score
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the next birthday 9/17/2006
the aunty : how old are you in the next birthday?
niece : i am gonna be 6!
aunty : how old were you last birthday?
niece : i was 4!
aunty : so, how come you gonna be 6 in the next birthday!?
niece : its simple! i am 5 years now!
1 Comments, 20 Views,
3 Votes
,5.39 Score
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I have no idea if you will think this is funny or not 8/31/2006
Today while I waited at the pharmacy... one of the ladies
behind the counter ask the lady beside me if she was the lady
with the nuts........I was surprised and waited for the
older lady to answer and she said Yes.....so I waited a minute
and I said Did she just ask you if you were a nut with other
nuts? the little older lady started laughing, my step dad
was ...
3 Comments, 125 Views,
10 Votes
,4.98 Score
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IN the midst 8/31/2006
of Rugged's serious blog
on things......I decided to play a joke on him......here
it is and he even laughed about it. I have nothing agaist
smokers this is just a joke. So please, just look at it with
a sense of humor.
_______________________________________________
Did you hear about the woman in the news? She was a chain smoker
and since ...
1 Comments, 22 Views,
2 Votes
,5.20 Score
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A smarter mom 8/16/2006
A six year old was fond of stealing candies from the
candy basket. One day her mom decided to put the candies
on top of the wardrobe. But he continued to steal them by
climbing unto a stool and reaching the candy basket.
His mom then put the candies in the fridge.
The returned from school the next day and went straight
for the stool, but this time there were no candies. while ...
1 Comments, 33 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
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the only clean joke i know 8/6/2006
A railway worker, working in a secluded signal box wants
promotion to become a senior signalman. He applies to take
a test and weeks later an examiner arrives. He asks the signal
man, "If 2 trains are heading towards each other on
that track, what would you do?" Thats easy replies
the signal man, "I'd pull that red lever, stopping
the up train, and swithing the down train to the other ...
1 Comments, 44 Views,
7 Votes
,4.31 Score
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a few more beers 8/6/2006
Tom and Dave are in a bar drinking. At about 9 pm Tom says to
his friend, "I'm off home". When Dave asks
why, Tom replies that if he doesn't go his wife will
go crazy, Stunned at how submissive his friend is, Dave
offers advice. "Why don't you do what i do. Stay, ...drink
as much as you want, then when you go home, sneak in through
the door, climb the stairs quietly, leave thelights out, ...
1 Comments, 14 Views,
1 Votes
,5.00 Score
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Walking on water 7/26/2006
There was a minister, a priest and a pastor in
a boat fishing. The ministor says Oh nooooooooo we forgot
the tackle box on land. The priest jumps up and says I will
get it so he steps out of the boat and walks across the water
gets the takcle box and comes back. The pastor says if he
can walk on water so can I ........he steps out of the boat
and quickly sinks to the bottom. The ...
1 Comments, 76 Views,
8 Votes
,3.94 Score
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They say laughter is the best medicine 7/26/2006
A joke for the day
Superman was flying over a building and low and behold he
saw wonderwoman nude sunbathing on the top of a building......should
I he thought........I am faster than a speeding bullet......she
will never know......so he swoops down does the deed and
is off......wonderwoman says what was that and the invisible
man says I dont know but my bum ...
1 Comments, 65 Views,
5 Votes
,1.84 Score
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Jack and Jill 7/25/2006
A man buys a small diner in Wisconsin. It's more of a
greasy spoon, truck stop deal.He starts off small and hires
a cook named Jack and a waitress named Jill to start off.
It's summertime, so business is ok and he hires a few
more parttime summer workers. Soon fall comes and then
winter. In the dead of winter business starts to drop off.
He can't afford to keep paying his help, so goes to ...
1 Comments, 81 Views,
8 Votes
,3.48 Score
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Noy sure if you can call this a joke? 7/15/2006
I want to test your brain.
Farmer Brown had a hay (Corn) stack in his field but didnt
want it anymore! so he went to see Farmer Joe! to see if he
wanted it?
Farmer Joe said "Sure put it in my field with the other
one" so farmer Brown said "thankyou"
and put his hay (Corn) stack in with farmer Joe`s.
How many Hay (Corn) Stacks did farmer Joe now have?
1 Comments, 69 Views,
0 Votes
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The Older We Get................ 7/14/2006
The Older We Get, the more we get like
COMPUTERS!
We start out with lots of MEMORY and DRIVE, then we become
outdated, CRASH at odd moments, and eventually have all
our PARTS replaced! 
2 Comments, 145 Views,
15 Votes
,3.13 Score
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Looking to buy a frog?!? 7/11/2006
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I
show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?"
The bartender considers it, then agrees. The man reaches
into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into
his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches,
cracks his knuckles, and proceeds to play the blues.
After the man finished his drink, he ...
1 Comments, 76 Views,
7 Votes
,3.55 Score
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nuts 7/6/2006
A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients
to a baseball game.
For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond
to his commands.
When the day of the game arrived. Everything went quite
well. As the National
Anthem started, the doctor yelled, "Up Nuts",
and the patients complied by standing up.
After the anthem, he yelled, ...
1 Comments, 54 Views,
9 Votes
,3.43 Score
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should winess childbirth? 7/6/2006
Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to
the call. The house was very dark so the paramedic asked
Kathleen, a 3-yr old girl to hold a flashlight high over
her
mommy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby.
Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked.
Heidi pushed and pushed and after a little while, Connor
was born. The paramedic lifted him by his ...
1 Comments, 47 Views,
5 Votes
,5.43 Score
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humor in the golden years 7/5/2006
An elderly couple is enjoying an anniversary dinner together
in a small tavern. The husband leans over and asks his wife,
"Do you remember the first time we had sex together
over fifty years ago? We went behind this tavern where you
leaned against the fence and I made love to you."
Yes, " she says, "I remember it well."
OK, " he says, "how about taking a stroll ...
1 Comments, 68 Views,
11 Votes
,4.10 Score
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ta-da 7/5/2006
How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the
F word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
1 Comments, 41 Views,
4 Votes
,4.41 Score
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dumb men 7/5/2006
On their wedding night, the young bride approached her
new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first
lovemaking encounter. In his highly aroused state, her
husband readily agreed. This scenario was repeated each
time they made love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking
that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other
incidentals that she needed.
Arriving home ...
0 Comments, 48 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
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ALL I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT LIFE I LEARNED FROM THE EASTER BUNNY 7/5/2006
Don't put all of your eggs in one basket
Walk softly and carry a big carrot
Everyone needs a friend who is all ears
There's no such thing as too much candy
All work and no play can make you a basket case
A cute little tail attracts a lot of attention
Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day
Let happy thoughts multiply like ...
1 Comments, 17 Views,
0 Votes
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life lesson 2 7/5/2006
Lesson Two:
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to
be able to get to the top of that tree, " sighed the
turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my manure
droppings?" replied the bull. "They're
packed with nutrients."
The turkey pecked at a lump of manure, found it actually
gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of ...
1 Comments, 30 Views,
3 Votes
,4.41 Score
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life lesson 7/5/2006
Lesson One:
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A
small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also
sit on my ass like you and do nothing?" The eagle answered
"Sure, why not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle, and rested.
Suddenly, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson: To be sitting on your ass and doing ...
1 Comments, 25 Views,
1 Votes
,3.70 Score
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Apple Pie and Coffee, Please 7/4/2006
After many years of trying, the Russian family has finally
able to bring grandpa to America to live with them. The old
gentleman could only speak Russian.
Each when the family members were at work granpa would spend
his time at the park, walking, watching the
play and feed ducks a few crumbs he brought along.So that
he will be able to get a lil something to eat, thet thought
him ...
3 Comments, 103 Views,
13 Votes
,2.14 Score
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DONT LAUGH NOW ! 7/4/2006
An elderly farish priest became unhappy with the things
he was hearing during confessions. After his sermon one
Sunday morning, he said to his congregation, "Im
tired of hearing so many people tell me in confession that
they have cheated. For thirty years people have been saying
to me "I have cheated with Marie...I have cheated
with Zeni..I have cheated with Marlene.Im sick and tired
of ...
1 Comments, 31 Views,
3 Votes
,4.41 Score
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LOTTO TICKET 7/4/2006
One day the wife comes home with a spectacular diamond ring.
"Where did you get that reing?" her husband
asks.
"Well, " she replies, " my boss and i played
the lotto and we won, i bought it with my share of the winnings."
A week later, his wife comes home with a long shiny fur coat.
"Where did you get that coat?" her husband ask.
"My boss and i played the lotto ...
1 Comments, 39 Views,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score
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BEN WHO? 7/3/2006
Decker wasn't the brightest guy in the world
and his co workers were continually ribbing
him at the factory. One in particular, is Jim
would greet him each morning and percipitate
this exchange:
"Say, Decker, you seen Ben?"
"Ben who?"
"Ben down and kiss my ass!"
Tired of falling for the same joke day after day. Decker
confided in his more wordly brot
her, who ...
1 Comments, 30 Views,
4 Votes
,2.08 Score
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Blonde joke 7/1/2006
Q. Why did the blonde stare at
the can of frozen orange juice?
A. Cause it said concentrate.
 JUlliette...
1 Comments, 23 Views,
7 Votes
,2.53 Score
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2 drunk in a bar 7/1/2006
Two old drunks in a bar. The first
one says, "Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on,
I couldn't bend it with either of my hands. By the time
I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really
hard. "By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20
degrees, no problem. I'm gonna be 60 next week, and
now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand" ...
1 Comments, 64 Views,
8 Votes
,3.25 Score
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Waiting on my house 7/1/2006
There's this drunk standing
out on the street corner, and a cop passes by, and says, "What
do you think you're doing?" The drunk says, "I
heard the world goes around every 24 hours, and I'm
waiting on my house. Won't be long now, there goes my
neighbor."
JUlliette
1 Comments, 38 Views,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score
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