|
A Wedding to Make You Chinge! (True Story!) :( 11/16/2005
You gotta love this guy! This is a true story about
a recent wedding that took place at Clemson University.
It was in the local newspaper
and even Jay Leno mentioned it.
It was a huge wedding with about 300 guests. After the wedding
at the reception, the groom got up on stage with a microphone
to talk to the crowd. He said he wanted to thank everyone
for coming, ...
2 Comments, 1207 Views,
121 Votes
,8.58 Score |
|
I Want to Buy That 7/23/2005
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can
buy the TV in the corner.
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve
blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The
next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing,
and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again,
to a shade of ...
1 Comments, 1034 Views,
115 Votes
,4.49 Score |
|
Loving Old Couple 6/4/2006
A little old couple walked slowly into a McDonalds one cold
winter's evening.
<br>
They looked out of place amid the young families and young
couples eating there that night. Some of the customers
looked admiringly at them.
<br>
You could tell what the admirers were thinking. - "Look,
there is a couple who has been through a lot together, probably
for 60 years or ...
2 Comments, 916 Views,
92 Votes
,5.43 Score |
|
Men are right! 8/12/2007
If a man speaks in the forest, and there is no woman around
to hear him, is he still wrong?
2 Comments, 136 Views,
86 Votes
,7.92 Score |
|
Revenge 8/12/2007
What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around
in pain on the ground?
<br>
- Shoot him again.
1 Comments, 154 Views,
79 Votes
,7.33 Score |
|
Love, Lust and Marriage 12/3/2004
LOVE - When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
LUST - When your tongues meet across a crowded room.
MARRIAGE - When you lose your in crowded room.
<br>
<br>
LOVE - When intercourse is called "making love."
LUST - When intercourse is called "screwing."
MARRIAGE - What the hell are you talking about?
<br>
<br>
LOVE - When you argue over how many ...
0 Comments, 173 Views,
75 Votes
,8.63 Score |
|
To be serious on here you need a sense of humour! 11/4/2006
During the past three years I have met several men on this
site. (All American) I met the first a few weeks before he
was due to travel. Seemed like a nice guy. Once he left, he
sent me a romantic e mail and I responded - only to receive
a reply .....from his wife! (It was a joint e mail account!)He
recently sent me an e mail saying he returned to a nearby
country and would I join him ...
3 Comments, 977 Views,
68 Votes
,6.62 Score |
|
Blonde 8/12/2007
Why are most Blonde jokes one-liners?
So men can understand them.
1 Comments, 254 Views,
66 Votes
,7.19 Score |
|
Great Jokes 6/5/2006
A woman was taking her husband to a retirement home. As she
was driving in the gate she saw three naked old ladies lying
on the lawn. She went to the clerk and said
“Now see here, I want to leave my husband here but when I drove
in I saw three naked old ladies lying on the lawn.”
The clerk said “Oh don’t pay any attention to them, there
just three retired ...
1 Comments, 153 Views,
65 Votes
,7.04 Score |
|
Things Men Need to Know 12/3/2004
1. The reason our bras don't always match our underwear
is because
WE actually CHANGE our underwear.
<br>
2. The next time you and your buddies joke about armed women
in
combat, take a poll to see which of you successfully aim
at
the toilet bowl.
<br>
3. If we're watching football with you, it's
not bonding. We're
watching because of the butts.
...
0 Comments, 190 Views,
58 Votes
,7.11 Score |
|
Batteries 8/12/2007
Why is a man better than a vibrator?
<br>
Because the man is cheaper than batteries!
1 Comments, 442 Views,
56 Votes
,4.80 Score |
|
Money Problems Solved! 8/12/2007
Work hard, save money, and your wife will spend it.
1 Comments, 218 Views,
54 Votes
,5.61 Score |
|
meeting the parents 6/4/2006
the first real time i went to meet my bf's parents, i
felt i had to really impress them. they were having his
a birthday party and i thought, "hey perfect time
to show them the real me"
i had been taking medications for some stomach problems
i had been having but didnt expect anything to go wrong with
the meds.
we sat down at the table and were ready to eat some cake and
ice cream. ...
4 Comments, 558 Views,
54 Votes
,4.04 Score |
|
1st experience with my inexperienced lover!!! 1/5/2006
I met my current partner about six years ago now. The first
time we got it together intimately was one of the most memorable
times of our relationship for me (although not for any romantic
reasons). Looking back on it now it seems quite funny, although
at the time I thought it a little odd.............Let me
explain!
I am the only lady that my partner has ever spent the entire ...
0 Comments, 883 Views,
50 Votes
,3.16 Score |
|
Send the Bottle Back 12/27/2004
A man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant and while
sitting at his regular table, he notices a gorgeous woman
sitting all alone at a nearby table. He calls the waiter
over and asks for their most expensive bottle of Merlot
to be sent over to her, knowing that, if she accepts it, she
is his.
<br>
The waiter gets the bottle and quickly brings it over to
the woman,
saying ...
2 Comments, 394 Views,
47 Votes
,6.54 Score |
|
New Maid 9/20/2007
A guy dials his home number from work. A strange woman answers.
The guy says, "Who is this?"
"This is the maid, " answered the woman.
"We don't have a maid!"
"I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house."
"Well, this is her husband. Is she there?"
"Ummm...she's upstairs in the bedroom with
someone who I just figured was her ...
5 Comments, 501 Views,
46 Votes
,4.88 Score |
|
All men lie...I should know, I am one! 5/30/2005
Hey I know I aint making any friends writing this lttle ditty
but lets face it....any guy will say whatever it takes to
get what he wants from a woman...maybe women made it that
way, who knows....but IMHO if a man says he is completely
honest with women then he's probably just better at
playing the game....I aint talking about flat out fabricating,
more those little situations that us guys ...
3 Comments, 158 Views,
45 Votes
,4.33 Score |
|
Black Eye 8/12/2007
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
<br>
Nothing, you already told her twice.
1 Comments, 259 Views,
41 Votes
,0.10 Score |
|
Humour in Love and Hate 12/14/2004
You know your relationship is a joke when your loved one
says I LOVE you everytime you leave. Yeah, that's a
bummer. You know they really hate you when they say I hate
you everytime your in the same room with them. Well, if you're
having problems with a loved one and you wanna get just as
back.
You can always call up their bossy and ask;Where's
that sexy girl/man! I can't wait till ...
0 Comments, 113 Views,
41 Votes
,0.10 Score |
|
Light Bulb 8/12/2007
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
<br>
Three - one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him brag
about the screwing part.
1 Comments, 180 Views,
40 Votes
,5.87 Score |
|
Whine 8/12/2007
Why do little girls whine?
<br>
Because they're practicing to be women.
1 Comments, 108 Views,
34 Votes
,4.50 Score |
|
What my niece found in her moms bedside drawer! 11/27/2006
I was baby sitting my siter-in-laws one night
when my 6 year old little niece gave me reason to laugh after
I left!
<br>
She whispered in my ear, "Auntie Louise, do you wanna
see something really gross?"
<br>
Before I had a chance to answer she produced this "electric
ear cleaner".
<br>
"It's Moms", she said cheekily, "It's
a secret in her drawer!"
<br> ...
1 Comments, 608 Views,
34 Votes
,5.13 Score |
|
Men who enjoy lies 3/7/2005
Hi, I want to share with you an experience that I had on line,
I met a "man" about many many years ago, about
8 years ago, and we decided to meet each other, so we met inside
a store, both of us were supposed to take a rose so we can know
each other, the only stupid was me because I was the only
one who had a rose, we had necer seen before because it was
a chat without pictures, so we met, ...
2 Comments, 434 Views,
32 Votes
,2.96 Score |
|
Apples and Wine :-)) 12/1/2004
Apples and Wine
<br>
Women are like apples on trees.
The best ones are at the top of the tree.
Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because
they are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten applesfrom the ground
that aren't as good, but easy.
So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when
in reality, they're ...
1 Comments, 258 Views,
32 Votes
,6.15 Score |
|
Snoring 8/12/2007
Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after
mating?
<br>
- To stop the snoring before it starts.
1 Comments, 264 Views,
30 Votes
,6.57 Score |
|
DATE GONE WRONG! 6/4/2006
I met a guy on this site after I'd chatted to him online
for a few weeeks. He looked pretty fit from his profile photo,
and from his chats I liked his personality.
But when we agreed to go on a date, I couldn't see him,
thinking he hadn't turned up for the date I was about
to leave the bar. Then some guy grabs me by the arm, and starts
chatting to me like he knows stuff about ...
9 Comments, 725 Views,
30 Votes
,3.53 Score |
|
irony of a chat room 9/18/2005
"any ladies wanna chat"?..(no one replys)..."any
ladies wanna chat"? ...(no one replys)..."I
own a succesful company"...(all the Asian girls
say "hello" and all the American women say "yeah
right")
<br>
so I try a different approach..
<br>
I send a private messege saying "hello I'm interseted
to meet you"...the reply is:"go away you sleaze
ball I dont do private messages ...
2 Comments, 265 Views,
30 Votes
,4.61 Score |
|
Women are smarter than Men 1/23/2005
It's obvious that women are smarter than men, think
about it! Diamonds are a girl's bestfriend; man's
best friend is a dog!
4 Comments, 178 Views,
30 Votes
,3.53 Score |
|
don't interrupt 8/11/2007
Little Johnny watched his daddy's car pass by the
school playground and
go into the woods. Curious, he followed the car and
saw Daddy and Aunt
Jane in a passionate embrace. Little Johnny found this
so exciting that
he could not contain himself as he ran home and
started to tell his Mother .
"Mommy, I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's
car
go into the woods
with ...
1 Comments, 184 Views,
27 Votes
,7.24 Score |
|
Dishes 8/12/2007
How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb?
<br>
None, she can do the dishes in the dark.
1 Comments, 226 Views,
25 Votes
,3.46 Score |
|
What are you going to do with that..... 9/3/2006
I was dating a lady years ago and one night I forgot to lock
the door. She decided to come over after partying late unannounced
and she came in, walked up the stairs and was standing over
me in bed when I woke up startled. I jumped up ran down the
stairs naked with my pillow. She died laughing and asked
"what I was going to do with the pillow?"
5 Comments, 420 Views,
25 Votes
,3.02 Score |
|
On The Hunt For A Good Man!!! 12/29/2005
Viginia was talking to her brother about the kind of guy
whe would like for a boyfriend. She said "I'd
like man who is assertive but not aggressive, confident
but not an egomaniac, sensitive but not a wimp and good looking
but not conceited'
So her brothger said to her "Virginia if you can find
a guy like that I"LL have sex with him!!!"
0 Comments, 452 Views,
25 Votes
,0.37 Score |
|
Time 8/12/2007
What do you do when a woman asks you the time?
<br>
Tell her there is a clock on the stove.
1 Comments, 191 Views,
24 Votes
,1.08 Score |
|
Sad Story :~( 11/27/2006
Mommy.. Johnny brought a gun to school,
<br>
He told his friends that it was cool,
<br>
And when he pulled the trigger back,
<br>
It shot with a great crack.
<br>
Mommy, I was a good girl, I did What I was told,
<br>
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!
<br>
But Mommy, when I went school that day,
...
1 Comments, 358 Views,
24 Votes
,4.15 Score |
|
Very Touching :( 12/18/2004
it's touching!
<br>
A girl and a boy were on a motorcycle, speeding
through the night. They loved each other a lot..
Girl:" slow down a little.. I'm scared.."
Boy: "No, it's so fun.."
Girl: "please..it's so scary.."
Boy: "Then say that you lovem e.."
Girl: "Fine..I love you..can you slow down now?"
Boy: "Give me a big hug.."
The girl gave him a big hug.
...
0 Comments, 288 Views,
24 Votes
,1.20 Score |
|
Sorry I'm Late 8/12/2007
This is a true story and when I heard it, I LMAO!!! Please
keep in mind that both people in this are very nice mild people.
<br>
My Aunt (I'll call her Aunt Bea) was late joining her
husband (I'll call him Uncle John) and company at a
wedding.
<br>
When she finally arrived, she saw that everyone had already
had their appetizers and was halfway through the main dish. ...
3 Comments, 300 Views,
23 Votes
,3.24 Score |
|
what makes my love.. 1/16/2011
The feeling of emptiness is no longer around,
surrounded by butterflies and beautiful sound.
Now that I met you it all seems so clear,
that you are the angel that was sent to me here.
Hearing you laugh and seeing you smile,
shows me that it’s all worth the while.
Feeling the warmth of your body on mine
Sends chills up and down my spine.
Looking into your beautiful eyes,
...
3 Comments, 234 Views,
22 Votes
,3.85 Score |
|
White 8/12/2007
Why do brides wear white?
<br>
So the dishwasher matches the fridge and stove.
1 Comments, 512 Views,
22 Votes
,1.44 Score |
|
Why Is It . . ? 6/17/2006
Why is it, that when a girl dresses up, does her hair, nails,
make up, and puts an all out effort into her appearance.
But, when she does nothing, is feeling horrible, she gets
picked up on? I've found this to be a common complaint or
observation between all my friends and I. We'll have just
gone to the gym, are feeling ill or what not, and are flirted
with. But the minute we try our ...
2 Comments, 275 Views,
20 Votes
,1.59 Score |
|
triple dates 4/29/2006
a man was triple dating but unfortunately
for him one day he finished having sex with one of his girlfriens
and as usual was exhausted he got home to find another waiting
for him he had no choice than to go in for her in during the
process another called him that she was waiting for him
in trhe air port and she was giving him a special bed treat
on hearing that he slumped
1 Comments, 377 Views,
20 Votes
|
|
Embarrassing moment 1/27/2005
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my decided
to release some pent-up energy and run amok. I was finally
able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust
and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she
did not start behaving "right now" she would
be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said
in a voice just as threatening, "If you ...
1 Comments, 212 Views,
20 Votes
,5.81 Score |
|
Humor???? 12/3/2004
yeah it is good to have humor in a relationship, laughter
is good medicine for the soul. If anyone can make me laugh
they are ok. I can make people laugh too but mostly it is him.
To me there is nothing wrong with that, everyone should
smile at least once a day eh? Even in public.
1 Comments, 144 Views,
20 Votes
,1.59 Score |
|
love and \bsexo?\b, which you choice 8/30/2007
my freind told me western world, people more care \bsexo?\b
in family, and i talked many men here, most men divorced
, they always told me , their wives went to other man.....
4 Comments, 146 Views,
19 Votes
,3.39 Score |
|
Did you know guys? 8/30/2007
Did you know that there is a part of a woman that a
guy can touch that will turn her on and make her go crazy?
That when you touch this spot she will be yours?
Answer: Her heart. ...
3 Comments, 243 Views,
18 Votes
,4.08 Score |
|
A Kind Man 8/11/2007
A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local
golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green
when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to
the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap,
closes his eyes and bows in prayer.
His friend says, "Wow, that is the most thoughtful
and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind ...
1 Comments, 84 Views,
18 Votes
,3.53 Score |
|
Insecurity vs. Trust In A Relationship 10/19/2005
Something funny I've noticed about some couples,
and is probably evident to some extent in many others is
their insecurities of their partner. I had been observing
during one of my trainrides back home, a Chinese guy - Aussie
lady couple whom i've encountered many times before,
and they were sitting adjacent to me this time. From what
I had gathered so far, I could tell that the Chinese ...
1 Comments, 264 Views,
18 Votes
,4.63 Score |
|
read and see 11/29/2004
Come and get me baby! yow! Ok...On the one hand I'm looking
to make all kinds of friends from all over the place! On the
other hand...I'm also looking for THE ONE. so please
keep that in mind everybody...you too THE ONE (if you're
out there... because if you are? All my new found friends
and I will have to part company. I don't screw around
in a relationship. I'm total loyal, faithful, ...
0 Comments, 175 Views,
18 Votes
,0.40 Score |
|
Me and my sister 8/1/2005
Once I met this guy named Jimmy, in a little bar in my hometown.
He wanted to get together and I wasn't really interested.
He was very nice and everything though. Anyway, a few days
later my sister was telling me that she had a date that night
with this guy she met. It turned out to be this guy Jimmy.
We laughed about it and I begged her to let me get the door
when he arrived. So, ...
0 Comments, 235 Views,
17 Votes
,3.41 Score |
|
Couple 1/23/2005
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why.
When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders
why.
0 Comments, 218 Views,
17 Votes
,3.27 Score |
|
diff between married and bachelor 8/11/2007
Q. What is the difference between a bachelor and a married
man?
A. Bachelor comes home, sees what's in the refrigerator,
goes to bed. Married man comes home, sees what's in
the bed, and goes to the refrigerator.
2 Comments, 112 Views,
16 Votes
,2.39 Score |
|
Funny things 3/3/2006
Dating can have serious aspects or sometimes even bad dates
can be quite funny.
<br>
I once dated someone who decided to bring me flowers. What
a nice gesture, however he left the price tag on the bouquet.
<br>
Everyone has a funny story to tell and sometimes the funniest
are the weird pick up lines people use. I really couldn't
say what the silliest line I've ever heard, ...
0 Comments, 230 Views,
15 Votes
,3.59 Score |
|
Go figure... 12/8/2005
I come fome from work one day in the late summer, and my ex
is on the couch watching TV with the fireplace going. I asked
her why...she said the airconditioning was making her
cold! (she didn't turn the airconditioning off -just
tured the fireplace on)
1 Comments, 225 Views,
15 Votes
,4.05 Score |
|
The Prince Turns Into a Clown 7/24/2005
After searching on line for a man whom I felt was the apple
of my eye, I finally found him and his picture made me tingle
in places that I hadn't had any feeling for a very long
time. Or it seemed that way.
<br>
His wonderful words of prose matched my ideal. He understood
the feelings of women, the loving care he wanted to share
with that special one. He wrote about working with ...
1 Comments, 204 Views,
15 Votes
,2.52 Score |
|
Inside The Movie House 3/15/2005
My date and I went to the movie house to watch "Harry
Potter 2." The seats were permanently arranged in
an arc. We were seated at the back seat near the aisle. We
were just waiting for the start of the movie but we were distracted
by moviegoers who unintentionally blocked the screen.
<br>
My date was getting impatient and he said, "If someone
blocks the screen again, I will ...
1 Comments, 182 Views,
15 Votes
,2.82 Score |
|
wisdom and the courage 1/17/2005
At least three times every day take a moment and ask yourself
what is really important. Have the wisdom and the courage
to build your life around your answer.
0 Comments, 183 Views,
15 Votes
,4.05 Score |
|
good one 12/1/2004
HELLO MY ........ Dear Handsome, ...
Here is my chance to tell the world how lucky I am to have found
an amazing GIRL like you. All my life I felt like I was meant
to be alone, as if my someone took a wrong turn over a bridge
before I could meet them. Then came you... suddenly my eyes
went from clouded storms to small blue beacons. I was so
sad, and you took away all that pain just by ...
1 Comments, 162 Views,
15 Votes
,1.45 Score |
|
simple joke 7/26/2011
Q: Why do couples hold hands during wedding?..
hhhhhmmm???
A: It is just a formality. like two boxers, the shake hands
before the fight begins...
4 Comments, 83 Views,
14 Votes
,3.78 Score |
|
Way to a Man's Heart 3/19/2005
Why do they say that the way to a man's heart is through
his stomach, when clearly there is a better way?
3 Comments, 254 Views,
14 Votes
,3.46 Score |
|
Honey let me be your Salty Dog ! Part IV 6/5/2008
The poker game was still going on but it was pitiful because
they were all so messed up or I was and it was hard to understand
what anyone was saying. The owner of the beer joint was gonna
let them continue to play as soon as he got all of the other
customers out of the place because he was gonna play too.
I stood around and talked to a couple of different people
a few minutes and about ...
9 Comments, 102 Views,
13 Votes
,3.98 Score |
|
You know you still love her when..... 8/11/2007
You used to be a breast man and now look at asses..cause she
had one
You like to insert her name into conversations just so you
can say her name
You get a woodie when you think about kissing
her
You would like to take her back even though
she is pregnant with another man's
3 Comments, 121 Views,
13 Votes
,0.96 Score |
|
This is for the women who get hit on at least 5 times a day. 3/22/2011
Ladies, I've spent the past six months or so trying
to polish my singles skills again after a long bout of being
'committed'. Spent much time thinking about
the best way to approach a woman differently than the typical
stuff. Here are a few I've heard that don't really
sit well with me:
"Hey baby, you look great today"
"What's that perfume your wearing?"
"Baby, you're so sweet, ...
5 Comments, 189 Views,
12 Votes
,4.04 Score |
|
Recipe for a Soul Mate! 6/4/2006
1/2 cup Sincerity
1 cup Honesty
1 cup Respectfulness
1 cup Good Hygene
1/2 cup Healthy Attitude
A sprinkle of Nice Appearance
3 tablespoons Adventurous
1/2 cup Ambition
1 pint Family Oriented
2 tablespoons Intellegence
1 quart Fun
1 quart Laughter
A pinch of goofiness
<br>
Sift, mix, blend, stir and shake all of the ingredients
together at room temperature until ...
1 Comments, 317 Views,
12 Votes
,4.92 Score |
|
Beautiful Women!!! 11/15/2005
I have a friend who told me "I have never gone to bed
with an ugly woman but I have often woken up next to one!!!"
<br>
Thank God for alcohol or ugly people would never get laid!!!
1 Comments, 270 Views,
12 Votes
,0.50 Score |
|
arthur 10/7/2005
as she looked into his eyes she said, a good women could
make you stop drinking, arthur takes a drink of scotch and
replies, she have to be an awful big women!
1 Comments, 242 Views,
10 Votes
,1.39 Score |
|
Personality Blessings 12/1/2004
It is quite true that having a sence of humor can assist building
a lasting relationship. How to get around any stumbling
blocks getting started is not so simple... Once in the groove
greatest memories can be had during times like as an ice
cube dazzle occurs flirtatiously!
1 Comments, 166 Views,
10 Votes
,3.78 Score |
|
Do I Keep My Boyfriend or the Guy I Met Online? 12/4/2014
I’m in a state of confusion whether to ‘breakup’ or end communicating
with this guy. I’m 27 and he’s 26.
I met him online and we’ve been chatting for almost 6 months
now.
He’s halfway round the world, obviously. We just talk things
out if we’re not busy. We like each other but I guess he likes
me more because he ...
2 Comments, 44 Views,
9 Votes
,3.43 Score |
|
Reading the relaionship humor articles 8/11/2007
I find them to have a great sense of humor and
that is what life is all about. Finding humor in things can
be a way to cope with stress or just to have a good time. I am
not talking about laughting at people but finding humor
in things, situtations, jokes etc.
hugssssssssssss Julliette...
3 Comments, 61 Views,
9 Votes
,3.85 Score |
|
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? 8/11/2007
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like,
if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports,
and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
-- Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they're
going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get
to find out later who you're stuck with.
-- ...
2 Comments, 59 Views,
9 Votes
,5.56 Score |
|
Thes Two Polls Are Actually True!!! 6/4/2006
A recent Poll showed that guys live longer if they are celibate.
Another Poll showed that guys live longer if they are married.
So one can only conclude that if you are a guy and want to live
a long life then get maried but don't have sex with your
wife!!!
1 Comments, 243 Views,
9 Votes
,0.65 Score |
|
EarthWorm 3/22/2010
A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the
yard. The little boy finds an earthworm trying to get back
into its hole. He says, "Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole."
The grandfather replies, "I'll bet you five
dollars you can't. It's too wiggly and limp to
put back in that little hole."
The little boy runs into the house and comes back out with ...
1 Comments, 41 Views,
8 Votes
,5.33 Score |
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The Goofball 8/22/2008
I married the biggest goofball there ever was. About a couple
of months ago a case of hemrrhoids struck our household.
One morning my husband got up and brushed his teeth with
hemrrhoid cream. I died because he actually told me he did
it. But I am also talking about the man who thinks an impersonation
of squidward means standing on his head naked and swinging
body parts around saying 'hi, I'm ...
0 Comments, 92 Views,
8 Votes
,3.01 Score |
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UNIVERSAL... 8/30/2007
its language is the language of anarchy. its cry is cry of blackened eye wolf. dictators were born
and born again. ignorant of the word death, the mountains turn crazy vomiting
of lava, it frozen like dumb nights!
4 Comments, 68 Views,
8 Votes
,2.55 Score |
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A wife suspecting her husband, what happened? 9/7/2015
A man and his wife were living alone in the house and the husbands
does not like going out often, soon the wife employed a
cook for the house and she was a beautiful lady, the wife
suspected that husband now love going out in a particular
time soon the cook too, the wife also noticed that the husband
receives phone calls 10minutes before he leaves and the
name on the phone call in the ...
4 Comments, 102 Views,
7 Votes
,3.04 Score |
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Gynecologist's Assistant 4/3/2008
A young man goes into the Job Center in Kansas City , KS and
sees a job posting for a Gynecologist's Assistant.
Interested, he goes to learn more. "Can you give me
some details about this?", he asks the man behind
the desk. The Job Center man sorts through his files and replies,
"Oh yes here it is. The job entails you getting the
lady patients ready for the gynecologist. You have to help ...
1 Comments, 55 Views,
6 Votes
,4.22 Score |
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The Cyborg Woman 8/11/2007
Hey Guys looking for
the perfect woman? A woman without faults or flaws. A woman
of perfect proportions, like she was made from a mold with
only the best programs installed into her memory banks.
I recall in the Movie the Step-ford Wives, that housewife's
were brainwashed or something! Then they became sexy animals
that curbed their husbands ...
1 Comments, 58 Views,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score |
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different strokes , for different folks! 8/11/2007
Yes, i know its corny!
But that's something i heard from one of my best friends,
its simple but truthful. Some people just turned on to certain
types of people than to others. There's a saying that
goes: "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"
meaning good looks or \bsexo?\b appeal is different to
every person, we're all wired differently and i think
makes it more interesting ...
2 Comments, 34 Views,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score |
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you are not going to believe this!! 8/10/2007
I was seeing someone that was soooooo addicted to his mum.
Now i am not making this up at all i swear;
whenever he brought me flowers he bought his mum flowers!
whenever he wrote me a poem he did the same for his mum! it
got me thinking what else he does for his mum....hhmmmmm
has anyone met anyone crazier???
1 Comments, 69 Views,
6 Votes
,4.79 Score |
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first love 12/27/2007
why we can not forget our first
love?...
4 Comments, 79 Views,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score |
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Heaven's Shining Waters 9/20/2007
George W. Bush, Clinton, and Gore were all in heaven, and
the angel said, "You must cross this river and we will
judge how much you have sinned based on how far you sink."
Dubya goes first and gets up to his neck, but makes it across.
He looks back and sees Al Gore walking on the water. He appeals
to the angel saying, "He's sinned as much as I
have, what gives?"
The angel says, "He's ...
0 Comments, 53 Views,
5 Votes
,3.80 Score |
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...... funny poems.... 8/11/2007
Roses are Red....
Violets are Blue...
You're soooo cute...
How can I get to know You ?!?
3 Comments, 82 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score |
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I'm in love but you don't care. 8/7/2007
I was quite hesitant to write about this because I feel quite
strongly about the said lines. I didn't want to trash
it or do it such vile injustice. But I also thought a lot of
people would more or less relate to this topic because I
guess at some point they had once "loved" a person
who seemed to be utterly clueless and oblivious to the his
or her affection. The one-sided phenomenon.
...
1 Comments, 37 Views,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score |
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HOW 7/18/2005
How can I just let you walk away, just let you leave without
a trace , cos I stand here taking every breath with you , you're
the only one who really knew me at all, take a look at me now.
0 Comments, 70 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score |
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be funny 11/25/2010
for taking easy make you happy in every time and dont worry
of thing
1 Comments, 14 Views,
4 Votes
,4.41 Score |
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Humorous story 6/4/2010
Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s
cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know
why his father didn’t punish him? Louis: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
1 Comments, 12 Views,
4 Votes
,2.47 Score |
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tradition or not 3/22/2010
If it is traditional for men to give women roses on valentines
day, then what kind should women give to their man ? Tulips
of course !
2 Comments, 13 Views,
4 Votes
,3.63 Score |
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Mother 8/7/2007
Mothers are most Instinctive
Philosopher...
2 Comments, 45 Views,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score |
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Honey let me be your Salty dog ! 8/18/2007
This is a true story!
In July of 1984 and I was shacked up with a beautiful redheaded
ex-stripper and ex-car thief from Culpepper, Virginia
by the name of Julie in the small town of West, Tennessee
which was my hometown. Julie was 5ft. 2 inches tall with
medium length wavy dark red hair and a natural bust size
of 36 D that was way to big for her frame and she no doubt turned
heads ...
1 Comments, 88 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score |
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Honey let me be your Salty Dog ! Part II 8/12/2007
Anyways I got all cleaned up to go to this card game and
Julie is raising hell about me going out that early in the
day because she has a beauty appointment at 2:00 pm that
afternoon at a beauty shop that was 600 ft. away from my trailer
on the same side of the highway as the trailer park we lived
in was but this started an argument because of us only having
one car that day. My 76 Cougar was ...
1 Comments, 59 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score |
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Honey let me be your Salty Dog ! Part III 8/11/2007
There was were two fights over the pool tournament and
another fight I suppose just for the damn hell of it that
afternoon and we nearly had a fight over the poker game at
one point with different people getting in and out of the
game arguing as the juke box kept playing that crazy song
among some other crazy as hell ones to boot by what looked
like the Texas Chain Saw Massacre crew.
...
1 Comments, 49 Views,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score |
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Someone, somewhere, anyone,anywhere 11/24/2018
I came here to fix something and I can tell you about it later, if
you will like to meet I am looking towards meeting someone
who is nice, loving, honest caring and kind. I want a life
partner for who is going to love me! Someone that is going
to be my best of friend, and also ready to turn to your lover,
companion.. I am Someone that will takes your breath away
when we walk in a room. And am ...
1 Comments, 12 Views,
2 Votes
,4.50 Score |
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why 12/22/2011
when u love some one truly why she brake ur heart so easily
n badly.why n how she can brake eart so badly n dont say anything.
3 Comments, 41 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score |
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Who wants who? 3/11/2009
On the dating sites it is so funny...the older men want younger
women, the younger men want older women, some men want any
women..Guys have you ever thought about someone your own
age.. you might be surprised how full of life they are, and
heck you would sure have a lot more to talk about.
1 Comments, 36 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score |
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The Down Side For Being Considerate 8/11/2007
Somehow during the sweltering heat I managed to pick up
a summer cold. The last thing I want to do is pass it along
to my g/f or to her 4yr old so I have not gone over to her
place or seen her all week.
While that may be the right thing to do its difficult because
we miss each other a great deal.
Of course had I done the exact opposite and seen her she would
have gotten fed up with my ...
1 Comments, 37 Views,
2 Votes
,1.73 Score |
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Lawyers 2/22/2006
Ever had to deal with a lawyer.
Did you get skinned. They want your money, and your hide!!
1 Comments, 94 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score |
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Freedom Gone 8/11/2007
Now that the relationship is off and running
and I spend as much time at her place as I do my own ..is there
a recycling plant or disposal area where I can drop off my
freedom and turn in my "man card" ?
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Just kidding..life is good.
1 Comments, 50 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score |
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have a nice day. 8/11/2007
when your go walking in a street,
your will think in your home,
when your are in the coast, your
will think in your home, but if your
have not home, you are condenated.
and have a nice day.
1 Comments, 12 Views,
1 Votes
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Do this first 8/7/2007
At one time or another, we've all experienced a moment
so passionate that wasting time on foreplay was un-thinkable
-- and if you haven't yet, you should. However, getting
caught up in the heat of the moment is quite different from
pouncing on her out of nowhere, and cutting straight to
the chase on a regular basis.Many a times she needs a little
appetizer before the main course. Something as ...
1 Comments, 48 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score |
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Marriage 3/27/2016
I Looking a Woman For Marriage, (Caring, Loving, Open-minded)
0 Comments, 5 Views,
0 Votes
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