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Heaven's Shining Waters 9/9/2007
George W. Bush, Clinton, and Gore were all in heaven, and
the angel said, "You must cross this river and we will
judge how much you have sinned based on how far you sink."
Dubya goes first and gets up to his neck, but makes it across.
He looks back and sees Al Gore walking on the water. He appeals
to the angel saying, "He's sinned as much as I
have, what gives?"
The angel says, "He's ...
0 Comments, 53 Views,
5 Votes
,3.80 Score
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Last Request 9/9/2007
The inmate on death row was scheduled to be put to death by
firing squad the follow morning. Throughout the day, the
prison guards were being very nice to him. But when they
asked him if he wanted something specific for his last meal,
he said he didn''''t want anything special.
When they asked if there was something special he wanted
to do, he said nothing. It went on like this all day.
...
0 Comments, 46 Views,
4 Votes
,3.25 Score
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Gross, Grosser, Grossest 9/9/2007
What's grosser than gross? Two vampires fighting over a bloody tampon. What's grosser than that? Finding a used condom on the bottom of a mayonnaise jar.
What's grosser than that? When you open the refigerator and the rump rost farts in
your face.
0 Comments, 27 Views,
1 Votes
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Little Johnny's Mom's Vital Signs 9/9/2007
Little Johnny asks his mother how old she is.
Her reply is, "Gentlemen don't ask ladies that
question." Johnny then asks his mother how much she weighs.
Again the mother's reply is, "Gentlemen don't
ask ladies that question."
The boy then asks, "Why did daddy leave you?"
To this, the mother says, "You shouldn't ask
that, " and then sends him to his room. ...
0 Comments, 42 Views,
5 Votes
,2.82 Score
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Our local drugstore was robbed of 500 bottles... 9/9/2007
Our local drugstore was robbed of 500 bottles of Viagra.
The suspect is known to be a hardened criminal!
0 Comments, 20 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
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Sensitive Men 9/9/2007
Why is it so difficult to find men who are caring, sensitive,
and good-looking? They already have boyfriends.
0 Comments, 24 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score
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Porsche and Hedgehog 9/9/2007
What's the difference between a porsche and a hedgehog?
A hedgehog has its pricks on the outside.
0 Comments, 9 Views,
0 Votes
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Grandma 9/9/2007
What's that wrinkly thing on Grandma?
Grandpa.
0 Comments, 20 Views,
0 Votes
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Applying for a Job at the CIA 9/9/2007
A few months ago, there was an opening with the CIA for an
assassin. These highly classified positions are hard
to fill, and there's a lot of testing and background
checks involved before you can even be considered for the
position. After sending some applicants through the background
checks, training and testing, they narrowed the possible
choices down to two men and a woman, but only one ...
0 Comments, 20 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
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Honey let me be your Salty dog ! 8/7/2007
This is a true story!
In July of 1984 and I was shacked up with a beautiful redheaded
ex-stripper and ex-car thief from Culpepper, Virginia
by the name of Julie in the small town of West, Tennessee
which was my hometown. Julie was 5ft. 2 inches tall with
medium length wavy dark red hair and a natural bust size
of 36 D that was way to big for her frame and she no doubt turned
heads ...
1 Comments, 88 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score
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Honey let me be your Salty Dog ! Part II 8/7/2007
Anyways I got all cleaned up to go to this card game and
Julie is raising hell about me going out that early in the
day because she has a beauty appointment at 2:00 pm that
afternoon at a beauty shop that was 600 ft. away from my trailer
on the same side of the highway as the trailer park we lived
in was but this started an argument because of us only having
one car that day. My 76 Cougar was ...
1 Comments, 59 Views,
3 Votes
,3.92 Score
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Honey let me be your Salty Dog ! Part III 8/7/2007
There was were two fights over the pool tournament and
another fight I suppose just for the damn hell of it that
afternoon and we nearly had a fight over the poker game at
one point with different people getting in and out of the
game arguing as the juke box kept playing that crazy song
among some other crazy as hell ones to boot by what looked
like the Texas Chain Saw Massacre crew.
...
1 Comments, 49 Views,
3 Votes
,1.96 Score
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Honey let me be your Salty Dog ! Part IV 8/7/2007
The poker game was still going on but it was pitiful because
they were all so messed up or I was and it was hard to understand
what anyone was saying. The owner of the beer joint was gonna
let them continue to play as soon as he got all of the other
customers out of the place because he was gonna play too.
I stood around and talked to a couple of different people
a few minutes and about ...
9 Comments, 102 Views,
13 Votes
,3.98 Score
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Do this first 5/23/2007
At one time or another, we've all experienced a moment
so passionate that wasting time on foreplay was un-thinkable
-- and if you haven't yet, you should. However, getting
caught up in the heat of the moment is quite different from
pouncing on her out of nowhere, and cutting straight to
the chase on a regular basis.Many a times she needs a little
appetizer before the main course. Something as ...
1 Comments, 48 Views,
1 Votes
,2.40 Score
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UNIVERSAL... 2/22/2007
its language is the language of anarchy. its cry is cry of blackened eye wolf. dictators were born
and born again. ignorant of the word death, the mountains turn crazy vomiting
of lava, it frozen like dumb nights!
4 Comments, 68 Views,
8 Votes
,2.55 Score
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love and \bsexo?\b, which you choice 2/21/2007
my freind told me western world, people more care \bsexo?\b
in family, and i talked many men here, most men divorced
, they always told me , their wives went to other man.....
4 Comments, 146 Views,
19 Votes
,3.39 Score
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I'm in love but you don't care. 1/29/2007
I was quite hesitant to write about this because I feel quite
strongly about the said lines. I didn't want to trash
it or do it such vile injustice. But I also thought a lot of
people would more or less relate to this topic because I
guess at some point they had once "loved" a person
who seemed to be utterly clueless and oblivious to the his
or her affection. The one-sided phenomenon.
...
1 Comments, 37 Views,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score
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first love 1/16/2007
why we can not forget our first
love?...
4 Comments, 79 Views,
5 Votes
,4.12 Score
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you are not going to believe this!! 1/16/2007
I was seeing someone that was soooooo addicted to his mum.
Now i am not making this up at all i swear;
whenever he brought me flowers he bought his mum flowers!
whenever he wrote me a poem he did the same for his mum! it
got me thinking what else he does for his mum....hhmmmmm
has anyone met anyone crazier???
1 Comments, 69 Views,
6 Votes
,4.79 Score
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Mother 12/18/2006
Mothers are most Instinctive
Philosopher...
2 Comments, 45 Views,
4 Votes
,2.86 Score
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Did you know guys? 11/21/2006
Did you know that there is a part of a woman that a
guy can touch that will turn her on and make her go crazy?
That when you touch this spot she will be yours?
Answer: Her heart. ...
3 Comments, 243 Views,
18 Votes
,4.08 Score
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A wife suspecting her husband, what happened? 11/7/2006
A man and his wife were living alone in the house and the husbands
does not like going out often, soon the wife employed a
cook for the house and she was a beautiful lady, the wife
suspected that husband now love going out in a particular
time soon the cook too, the wife also noticed that the husband
receives phone calls 10minutes before he leaves and the
name on the phone call in the ...
4 Comments, 102 Views,
7 Votes
,3.04 Score
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why 11/4/2006
when u love some one truly why she brake ur heart so easily
n badly.why n how she can brake eart so badly n dont say anything.
3 Comments, 41 Views,
2 Votes
,2.42 Score
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HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? 10/31/2006
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like,
if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports,
and she should keep the chips and dip coming.
-- Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they're
going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get
to find out later who you're stuck with.
-- ...
2 Comments, 59 Views,
9 Votes
,5.56 Score
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different strokes , for different folks! 10/27/2006
Yes, i know its corny!
But that's something i heard from one of my best friends,
its simple but truthful. Some people just turned on to certain
types of people than to others. There's a saying that
goes: "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"
meaning good looks or \bsexo?\b appeal is different to
every person, we're all wired differently and i think
makes it more interesting ...
2 Comments, 34 Views,
6 Votes
,3.08 Score
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...... funny poems.... 9/29/2006
Roses are Red....
Violets are Blue...
You're soooo cute...
How can I get to know You ?!?
3 Comments, 82 Views,
5 Votes
,2.49 Score
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have a nice day. 8/21/2006
when your go walking in a street,
your will think in your home,
when your are in the coast, your
will think in your home, but if your
have not home, you are condenated.
and have a nice day.
1 Comments, 12 Views,
1 Votes
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The Down Side For Being Considerate 8/5/2006
Somehow during the sweltering heat I managed to pick up
a summer cold. The last thing I want to do is pass it along
to my g/f or to her 4yr old so I have not gone over to her
place or seen her all week.
While that may be the right thing to do its difficult because
we miss each other a great deal.
Of course had I done the exact opposite and seen her she would
have gotten fed up with my ...
1 Comments, 37 Views,
2 Votes
,1.73 Score
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Freedom Gone 7/13/2006
Now that the relationship is off and running
and I spend as much time at her place as I do my own ..is there
a recycling plant or disposal area where I can drop off my
freedom and turn in my "man card" ? 
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Just kidding..life is good. 
1 Comments, 50 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
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Reading the relaionship humor articles 6/5/2006
I find them to have a great sense of humor and
that is what life is all about. Finding humor in things can
be a way to cope with stress or just to have a good time. I am
not talking about laughting at people but finding humor
in things, situtations, jokes etc.
hugssssssssssss Julliette...
3 Comments, 61 Views,
9 Votes
,3.85 Score
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