Dumbo.
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Posted:Feb 8, 2011 6:55 am
Last Updated:Aug 8, 2011 1:40 pm 8248 Views
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You do not see the world like me.
My eyes are so much dimmer.
Where i just see reality,
Your vision is much grimmer.
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2
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Dog-jobby
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Posted:Feb 8, 2011 6:54 am
Last Updated:Mar 18, 2011 7:54 am 8397 Views
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Dog-jobby, dog-jobby from whence did you spring?
Oot of an anus
Or some other thing?
Dog-jobby, dog-jobby
Yer so fricken huge
I could hollow you out and enter the luge.
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1
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Yeah really.
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Posted:Oct 9, 2010 2:15 pm
Last Updated:Aug 8, 2011 1:39 pm 9744 Views
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When i was a , at school the other thought i was weird cos i accidently swallowed a calculator. I have felt ever since that it's what's inside that counts.
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2
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I Know You.
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Posted:Oct 6, 2010 8:45 am
Last Updated:Feb 18, 2011 5:29 am 7996 Views
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I KNOW YOU.
I know your fingerprints.
I know you then and i know you since.
I know behind your eyes.
I know your female size (sighs).
I know your curvature.
I know you rich, i know you poor.
I know your "naughty" laugh.
I know you in and out the bath.
I know you intimate entire.
I know you true.I know you liar.
I know your secret thought.
I know, what i really ought not.
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1
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Woe is me the modern man.
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Posted:Sep 19, 2010 9:08 am
Last Updated:Aug 3, 2014 5:13 pm 8684 Views
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Woe is me the modern man.
Got false teeth and a spray-on tan.
I eat fois gras and expensive flan.
Drink cheap plonk from a metal can.
Got a bread-maker and an omelette pan.
Got a motorbike and a mini-van.
Got a personal trainer who's a heavy metal fan.
Got a life coach called Boabby Wan.
Got a little place fer Rory and a toilet just fer gran.
Oh woe is me the modern man
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3
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Penis Pixies
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Posted:Jul 18, 2010 3:19 am
Last Updated:Nov 12, 2010 2:17 pm 6697 Views
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Each night the penis pixies
visit me in my slumbers,
fill my satchel with sex-wees
almost beyond numbers,
make me behave like a moron,
make me behave like a man,
though, honest to goodness
that's really the last thing i am.
I blame those penis pixies
for all the woes of my life
Especially the fact that i'm single
and no longer have a wife.
T'weren't me who left our lovenest
T'weren't me who abandoned our bed
T'were naughty penis pixies
who invaded and conquered my head.
Deleted due to profanity?lol How old are the censors in here? 5? Penis is a profanity? Grow up fer fecks sake lol
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0
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Ticky-ticky-too
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Posted:Apr 1, 2010 2:16 pm
Last Updated:Nov 19, 2010 4:10 pm 7981 Views
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The Ticky-Ticky-Too
If i were a ticky-ticky-too
I'd be much the same as you,
I'd go to the movies and Sundays the zoo
I'd eat lots of sweeties and maybe some glue
I'd drink lots o fizzy and mugs of shampoo
I'd still have to pee and still have to pooh
(though the glue pooh might not be easy to do)
even though i was just a ticky-ticky-too
If i were a ticky-ticky-too
I'd be so in love with you
I'd plant all your seeds and sing till they grew
I'd give you my crayons and adore what you drew
I'd kiss your face and your neck and some other parts too
even though i was just a ticky-ticky-too
If i were a ticky-ticky-too
i'd be much the same as you
It's true!!!!
In my mind (You don't wanna visit there honestly) a ticky-ticky-too is a large fluffy bird, bit like a back-combed ostrich but of course you may feel that, what with pheonix, griffins, chickens and Britney Spears we already have more than enough mythical birds and wish to imagine some other beast.
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1
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Winter still
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Posted:Mar 31, 2010 8:10 am
Last Updated:Jul 2, 2017 9:13 am 9065 Views
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When Autumn surrenders her ruby lips
To Winter's cold embrace
I sit by the fire and think of you
And long to see your face.
As cold creeps in
beneath my skin
and rain is in my tear-duct
I recall
the lovely fall
and all the times we f***ed.
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5
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