| I'll keep trying. |
May 25, 2007 1:48 pm
1287 Views | We were born for the waves,
My children and i.
For all that salty,
Seductive, sailboats signify.
Me and my Angel daughter
Were born to live
On bread
and water.
Though my son
likes some fun
with his current bun.
Poor muse is looking a bit emaciated lol. | |
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4 Comments | |
| Toons o the week. |
May 25, 2007 1:07 pm
1174 Views | It's been a while and i know not many of you are interested but what the hay!.
My fave toons o the week are.
Mutya Buena- real girl (If yer not singing along by the end o the song yer deaf, so there!)
Pink- Leave me alone (Intelligent lyrics and a lovely voice)
Kate Nash- Foundations (Kinda Lily Allen for the over twenties lol) | |
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4 Comments | |
| Chicken guilt. |
May 25, 2007 4:59 am
1661 Views | Guilt has plagued me all my life.I have an over-developped conscience. But some things i feel i am rightly guilty for.
When i was living on a Kibbutz in Israel there was a chicken factory (I know chickens aren't real but bear with me) and one Saturday on our day off the Kibbutzniks required volunteers to load up a trailer with chickens for market and offered us all an extra day off if we helped out. Me and half a dozen ne-er-do-wells agreed and off we went. At the factory we were told just stick yer hand in the cage and get the chickens out and bring them to the trailer. At first us westerners were gently trying to coax the feckers out but it was nigh on impossible and the poor scared things would peck our hands. We quickly realised that with hundreds to load we were gonna have to be less squeamish and amazingly quickly our skins thickened up and we would simply reach in grab the birds legs and hoik it out (no doubt often breaking their legs in the process) Then if they struggled we'd give them a little tap on the head on a convenient post or something. In no time at all we were having competitions to see who could carry the most at one time with not the slightest regard for the poor beasts. I swear 90% of those birds left for market with broken bones and i'm sure many died en route from injuries inflicted by us gentle souls. I really know how easily one falls into the mentality of a concentration camp gaurd. You have a horrible and unforgiveable job to do so you do it as quickly and unthinkingly as you can.Only afterwards did the full extent of our mutual cruelty dawn on us and not a one of us felt clean or decent for many weeks i'm sure. I still feel there's no good deed i can do that will wipe the slate clean.
Well we'll call that number one of my tagged 5 things huh?
I'm gonna go wallow in me bath now and try not to think about what an absolute fecker i was.lol | |
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58 Comments | |
| "I'd like to bring peas to the world" |
May 24, 2007 1:26 pm
1330 Views |  | Miss Scotland modelling her new white wabbit sporran (Which appears to be moulting- the fecker!) and her latest skirt.
For her "talent" miss Scotland will be yodelling "Barbie girl" whilst juggling several live (and very angry) Haggisisisis, ehh Haggi.(We've run out of puffins) |
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17 Comments | |
| Monster Jack and his human slave. |
May 24, 2007 7:52 am
1191 Views |  | Here we have miss Scotland. Her hobbies are squirrel-baiting, juggling puffins and eating stuff. She wants to bring happiness to the world via the gift of interpretive yodelling. |
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7 Comments | |
| Repitition is a sign of bloggy old age, so it is! |
May 23, 2007 8:10 am
1360 Views | I've been trawling through the back pages o me blog (don't ask lol) and i thought i'd repost this 'ere ditty from back when i used to write sweet little odes.
I'm still wondering were the feck my muse has got to?lol
Undeniably in love.
My love is undeniable!
Like hope
Like the tides.
Like the stars and the sun.
(in whom the moon confides)
where-ever is my love,
There is where my heart resides.
My love is unbreakable!
Like a promise
Like courage.
Like the inevitable coming of age
(we cannot hide nor camouflage)
where-ever is my love,
lies my safe harborage. | |
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12 Comments | |
| Sporran fever. |
May 22, 2007 1:59 am
1145 Views |  | Here's a piccy of my latest eeeeby gum bay purchase. I got it fer me best boy but i kinda like it and i'm seriously tempted to keep it lol I wonder if Fern T feline will forsake her old love and fall fer this one when it arrives (My girly cat is in lurve with my current sporran)
I keep a cornucopia of treasures in my sporran. It's worse than a wummans handbag so it is. I even keep a pack of emergency condoms in there. Now that really is the triumph of optimism.lol.
Catch yer laters me darlin terrapinoes. |
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13 Comments | |
| Kinda forlorn. |
May 21, 2007 5:44 am
1131 Views | My Angel daughter still thinks i can fix things, mostly her maw and i guess while i'm around i do take charge and organise her life and keep her sober but the truth is nobody can fix another person. It's just not possible.So i keep temporarily fixing things as best i can till the next time.But my Angel thinks if i would just stay everything would be okay and we'd all live happily ever after. She'll be 16 this year,i guess she'll grow out of her idealism soon enough huh? Best to let her think her paw is superman for as long as i can.
I wonder when it was i realised i couldn't fix the world the way i wanted it? Seems like a long long time ago now.But i'm sure once i beleived the world could be beautiful and wonderous if only people would behave.
Yer all a bunch o feckers so you are!lol | |
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10 Comments | |
| Ginger minger whinge. |
May 15, 2007 2:33 pm
1435 Views | Gawd but i loathe that ginger twat from CSI Miami. He is such a dreadful actor and that patronising faux intelligence and the pointless hesitations and moronic posing just make me wanna slap the feckin eejit.
Sorry i just had to get that off me chestickles.lol
(But i'm madly in lurve with Caley so i tolerate him fer her sake. Am i not a lovely man?lol) | |
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11 Comments | |
| Barbie and the puking kitten. |
May 15, 2007 2:52 am
1422 Views | This morning as i cycled along plugged into my MP3 player (finally i've conceded defeat and joined the 21st century.It's a little, pink, cheap feller that i bought fer me angel daughter but then i got a better one off my beloved eeeeeeby gum bay so i got this un and she got that un.) and "Barbie girl" by Aqua came on. I was jiggling my bum and singing along (I don't sing to myself, i sing out and scare animals and small children.It's not so bad when i had the radio on full blast but now with me MP3 all the poor feckers can here is me wailing as i cycle along lol). Then i suddenly thought "What the fuh?" Barbie girl? When did i put that crap on there? lol I am such a snob sometimes. Obviously it was already loaded on the player when i got it. But i was happily singing along till i realised what i was singing along to.lol I really am a cultural snob.
anyhoo.
I just had a visit from one of Jack T (handsome) Cats' girlfriends. She's a little grey and white kitten called Millie T Moggie. She wandered into my lounge, puked up a hairball and left. Wasn't that nice of her? Cheeky little fecker!
Gosh but my life is exciting huh?
Catch yer laters me terrapinoes. | |
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11 Comments | |
