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Brucey's Semi Private Thoughts
  
Just random ramblings.
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Life Goes On. Jan 17, 2006 4:40 am
Mood: tired, 782 Views
It's 6:30 AM Tuesday as I write this. Some things going on made it hard for me to sleep last night but I did get in about 5 hours +.

I still have to get up and work and function everyday though. There's no button to put my life on hold and say, "hey wait while I sort something out." Nope, that would be nice but the bills have to be paid and children have to be taught.

I keep trying to face forward, do the right thing, but sometimes its frustrating because it seems no matter what I do it turns out all goofed up.

Well I'll see how today goes I guess. Like Elizabeth Perkins said to Tom Hanks in "Big". "Well that's what they xanax for." LOL!

For anyone else out there who's hurt, angry, upset or having trouble sleeping I can sympathize. Don't let anger destroy something good, anything good you feel about your life or someone or something in it.

Anger is a natural human emotion and it can serve a valuable purpose too, but it can also cause great damage to yourself and to others as well.
3 Comments
What a Day to Reflect on How D**n Well I Really Have It. :) Jan 16, 2006 6:11 pm
Mood: optimistic, 775 Views
Okay well today is Martin Luther King day here in the old U.S. of A. I got the day off, but on my way home from my other job I was thinking about just what a great and wonderful life I've really got. How much time have I spent moping around, depressed and upset about things the past several months?

Way too many. Then I got to thinking about some of the blogs I was reading earlier here written by women who are in danger, women who have lost loves of their lives and all means of sadness and despair and I realized that to have a job, my health, people who care about me and a family are just wonderful, wonderful gifts. If I lost any of these I'd REALLY have something to wail and be upset about, but I didn't lose those things and I hope I don't of course for a long, long time.

Does that mean my life is perfect? Ha, far from it, if my life was perfect I wouldn't be writing blogs on FF. What is needed is a little perspective. A colleague of mine, a beautiful young lady is 25 and a few weeks ago her husband of only a year was killed in a tragic accident coming home from the military to be with her.

She's beautiful, 25 years old and now she's a widow. Now THAT is a sad, depressing thing, and yet she's already back at work. I'm sure she's not happy, far from it, but it just tells me that I need to get up off my back, stop feeling sorry for myself about things I've lost or missed out on because of my own stupidity or lack of backbone and think of all the wonderful, wonderful things I really have going for me in my life and hopefully in a long happy future.

Okay there's my positive rant for the week if that is not an oxymoron.
1 comment
Wow!!! A Day Off. :) Jan 16, 2006 7:47 am
Mood: cold, 745 Views
Well even though it's only ONE it's still a day off today. We have MLK day off here so I slept until 9:00 am and just of course came onto FF to do a blog.

I just feel like doing as little as possible today and relaxing, so maybe that's what I'll do.

This would be a good day to go buy a cheesecake to munch on, not that ANY day's not a good day to do that.

I'm sure I will be back later to report on whether Reece Witherspoon or Kirsten Dunst made it over like they promised they would. LOL!
1 comment
Looking at the bigger picture of life. Jan 15, 2006 7:01 pm
Mood: contemplative, 808 Views
I've found that life is basically cyclical and that we go from being in deep depressing valleys at certain times of our lives and then if we wait long enough and get some encouragement and time to ourselves our natural sense of positivity and happiness reasserts itself.

When I think about my own life the real reason I'm here on FF at all is because a few years ago I reached rock bottom emotionally. I came here seeking emotional love, attention and support I was not getting out of my relationship.

But with anything in life including and especially relationships, people make mistakes, they get involved they end up hurting others or themselves. I feel that I was in a valley a couple weeks ago and things are starting to turn around for me. I just want to say thank you to all of my friends who have been there to give me love, kindness and attention. It makes it a lot easier to climb out of a valley and make it to the top of the mountainside when you've got tons of great friends.

For anyone else who is struggling and feels like they're in one of those valleys just keep smiling, remain positive and eventually things will fall into place for you, especially if you're determined to get it.
5 Comments
Sunday Morning. :) Jan 15, 2006 9:22 am
Mood: mellow, 702 Views
Well I got to sleep late again today, at least late for me. I got up around 9:00AM. Not too much going on today, just on FF and online a lot. It's 11:18AM here in the big O as I write this.

I have to work about 4.4 hours today but that shouldn't be overly strenuous. Tonight will be kind of nice because I have tomorrow off for it being MLK day and there is no school.

So really Sunday is more like a Friday or a Saturday night. Hmmmm I got really annoyed with my phone because last night I was paying a major bill online and just before I got my confirmation number my phone powered down. So now I don't know if my payment WAS or WAS NOT received and I can't afford to make it again if it WAS received. Since tomorrow is a holiday I'll have to see what to do about it.

I am in the mood for a big slab of cheesecake. LOL! Of course I'm always in the mood for a big slab of cheesecake. Can anyone help me out here?
0 Comments
On a "new" music tear lately. :) Jan 14, 2006 8:17 pm
Mood: pleased, 746 Views
I'm kind of a streaky person I guess. I will go years or months or days without doing something and then suddenly I'll get in the mood and go kind of bonkers and really get into something. Is anyone else like that?

Well lately, I've been on a kind of a new music purchasing tear. In the past week or so I have bought three brand new CD's.

First the other day I got into the mood to listen to some Green Day so I went out and bought American Idiot, which I really like a lot. It's got a lot of great songs on it in my opinion.

Then last Friday the DJ sang this beautiful song by White Lion called "When the Children Cry" and I liked it so much I went and found it and bought it. Then lately I'd been listening to one of my favorite groups, Secret Garden and tonight I went and bought a CD by them called Dream Catcher.

So what new CD's or music have my readers bought recently? Also does anyone else go on streaks like this or is it just me?
4 Comments
Grrrrr my one this morning didn't post. :( Jan 14, 2006 11:53 am
Mood: content, 681 Views
Hmmm my blog this morning never posted for some reason. Grrrrrr. Well about to head out to work. Went downtown today for a bit, had lunch at the art museum and then came back and got online for a bit.

Got a nice night's sleep last night. Although I went to bed late I slept until almost 9:30 this morning, so that's about 7.5 hours of sleep for a change.

Some interesting changes and ideas are beginning to happen in my life, but it's too early to comment on them, other than to say I'm beginning to formulate some ideas for my own future.
0 Comments
A Busy But Hopefully Enjoyable Evening and a Nice Long Weekend. :) Jan 13, 2006 4:35 pm
Mood: bouncy, 725 Views
Woohoo, it's finally the weekend. Today I got off one job a little early, ran some errands spoke with a friend on my cell, went and posted some to FF groups and then headed to my other job to get my hours in there because I'm going to a party tonight. It is really a staff holiday party although the holidays have been over two weeks. Anyway I don't expect it to be a rip-roaring wild affair or anything but it's nice to be going out for the second straight weekend to a party.

After the party is over, I'm seriously hoping to come home, change and then rush over to my favorite hangout to karaoke cause I only get to do that once a week and don't like to miss it. It's become sort of my night out during the week to unwind.

Don't know what's on the agenda for Saturday or Sunday. I'll probably watch some of the NFL playoffs and probably be online a lot too. The real nice thing is that there is no school Monday so I get an extra day off this week. Are you jealous? I think you are? If you give me cheesecake maybe we can work something out. LOL!
0 Comments
A long day and the end of first semester :) Jan 12, 2006 8:35 pm
Mood: excited, 752 Views
Kind of a long day but now it's onto a long weekend woohoo Well today was the last day of 1st Semester and we had finals today. After that I had to go work at my other job for a couple hours and then go back to school because we had an open house until 8:30.

I got home around 9:00 and by about 9:15 PM I finally got around to talking to my friends and checking on my blogs.

So how IS everyone? I'm just dying to know? Okay tomorrow is a busy day too because I have to work at school doing grades and stuff but then I go to my other job and work there before heading to our faculty holiday party at about 7:30 PM. After that I expect to eventually make it to karaoke at my favorite hangout, because if I don't I'll have to wait another entire week.
0 Comments
Second Blog Today :) Jan 11, 2006 9:13 pm
Mood: cheerful, 813 Views
Okay well today has been a really nice day for a change and thank goodness because there were no big hassles or emotional upsets or anything like that. Instead I finished the first day of finals today at school then went to the university and posted some to FF before going to my other job where I did fantastic.

Then I got home about 8:00 PM had almond chicken and the last piece of cheesecake. Then I got online and had a lot of fun talking with friends. I feel like I'm enjoying myself again after a couple rough weeks.

I'm also excited because although tomorrow will be a long day, because we have an open house recruitment thingie that I've got to attend for two hours tomorrow that Friday is a light day without the kids and only until about noon anyway and then Friday night it's our staff holiday party and then possibly some more karaoke and a long weekend with no school Monday cause of MLK day.

Oooo also it's payday this week too, which NEVER hurts.
1 comment
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