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Just Curious...
  
Curiousity running wild
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Acts of Kindness Jul 2, 2008 5:33 am
Mood: giddy, 274 Views
We've all heard a million times that random acts of kindness are the best things to give and to receive. While I've always practiced random acts of kindness toward others, I've never been the recipient of one until this past weekend.

This beautiful woman, in heart and soul, gave me a random act of kindness. She unselfishly gave me a weekend of unbelievable kindness, the ability to laugh freely, be myself again, and enjoy the moments of the day. She and I have never met in person, or even talked on the phone, but her gift will mean more to me than any gift I have ever received.

If only every one could find the ability to share from the heart to a complete stranger. I applaud what she gave me and hope that someday, I can return the act of kindness to her.

Having never thought about the act of kindness before outside of doing something nice, I can honestly say now, that they do mean something far greater than a passing moment in the recipient's life. They touch a place their heart that has been long missing, a belief in the human race again.

May all of you find it in your hearts to share a random act of kindness with a total stranger. It can be something as simple as buying the guy behind you in line a cup of coffee or paying the the lady in the car behind you in the drive thru's meal. While it seems trival sounding, it does touch their day and they do remember what you do, even if they have no face or name to put with it.

To the woman who gave me an act of kindness, she touched my heart forever because no one could ever take away my weekend of joy and happiness. She will always remain an Angel in my heart... always... even nameless and faceless. Only she knows who she is.

Try it... your act of kindness today may change a person's day for the rest of their lives - in a good way.
3 Comments
Grabbing Hold Jun 24, 2008 3:50 pm
Mood: calm, 335 Views
Love. Love is an amazing thing. It can give you the biggest and greatest joy of your life and the biggest and greatest disappointment in your life too. Odd isn't it. We all crave that four letter word to be a part of our lives, but we rarely look at it when it is right before our very eyes.

Sometimes in the midst of looking so hard for it, we fail to see what is right there offered to us. Love has a way of catching us off guard when we least expect it, and then, we run instead of grabbing hold of it.

To those like myself, don't run, grab hold and treasure the time, even if it is only for a short while. It's better to enjoy the time than to live a life of never grabbing hold of the one thing we crave so much.
6 Comments
A True Friend Jun 22, 2008 2:11 pm
Mood: grateful, 336 Views
Ever wonder what makes a true friend a true friend?

For me, it is the person who shares their life with me unselfishly. The good and bad, the joys and sorrows, the happy and sad, the oh my and what were you thinking moments.

It's the knowledge that there is no room for regrets, no judgments, no condemnation from this person. It's the acceptance of who you are and who they are...

And together,

You face life's challenges, You share laughter
You share tears of joy,You share tears of sadness
You share moments you wouldn't share with another

But together,

You have a person to lean on, You have a strength you didn't realize, You have a force to be reckoned with, You have a gift of the heart
You have a life of memories

And together,

There is nothing you can't do with the help of a true friend.

Thank God for those people who are your true friends. They get you where you need to be when you can't even see the road you are on.
5 Comments
Find a Better Pick Up Line Please!!! Jun 22, 2008 12:49 pm
Mood: amused, 320 Views
This is for the man who refuses to accept that I'm not 16 still, don't want to be 16 again, and I do love being 46. I don't want to relive memories over from 16 everyday, I want new memories and ones that are truly meaningful at this point in my life. Selfish - absolutely, but why settle for less than happiness?

For those who don't normally read my blog, I realize this is a weird blog, but let's all face it. The first thing you write to a person is what makes a person want to either talk to you or not. At the end of the day, I would rather be 46, not 16 again, and have a real relationship with someone. A relationship that could be mutually rewarding, intellectually stimulating, and well, the rest is icing on the cake, right?

There is nothing worse that getting five emails in one day on here from the same guy who refers to me as "Dixie Chick" and "Hiya Cutie" in one line. Worse is ....

"Hiya Cutie... I feel like I'm in HS again!" "Oh Yeah Babe"..."Me and You".

I realize that in the world of online dating that things are a little different. However, if you read my profile, I shared what I like and don't like, what I'm looking for, and why. Surely, if you wanted to get to know me, you would have found something in all the information I provided to have a few lines to converse about with me without insulting me.

Now I realize for the sake of argument here, I may be harsh here in my view point, but how does a "Oh Yeah Babe..." come on in your mind make me want to seriously get to know you? It doesn't because it tells me you didn't take the time to see what was important to me, it tells me you are writing to everyone hoping to connect with someone - anyone. Anyone...

At the end of the day, I am still me, I still like me, and I am completely okay with me. Not looking to change for a relationship, and not willing to settle for what is less than real...

If for whatever reason you still think I need a "personality," then that's okay too. I have one and I like the one I have - I'm multi-faceted, funny at times, sad at times, love my friends dearly, sassy, confident, have a sense of humor, can be entertaining, and I am able to realize that staying true to myself is better than reliving my teenage years just for a date.
7 Comments
Thank God for Answering Prayers Jun 20, 2008 1:26 pm
Mood: ecstatic, 248 Views
For months I had been praying for less stress in my life and that I find something to do for a living that made me feel better about what I was doing.... My job has always been rewarding in the past, but this past year, my job has been terrible. The place I worked at had been lying to employees, firing and doing unethical things...

For months, I have been physically sick and just the thought of having to go in to work made me sick. A few months ago, I literally got told by my doctor to get more rest and get rid of some stress - even if I had to find a new job.

Can't believe it... I got fired! LOL I got fired for being sick and using up all my vacation time. they fired me for being unavailable to work! Guess the policy handbook was wrong about using your PTO any way you wanted. Even funnier, I had doctor's excuses for medical treatment for each day I was out!

God answered my prayers when I got fired for being sick - the very place that made me sick to begin with! God does have a sense of humor and knows exactly when to use it! Thank God for small miracles.

Now I don't have to work for a lying prick anymore!!!!!
4 Comments
Memories of a Lost Child Jun 11, 2008 7:54 am
Mood: gloomy, 357 Views
Today, I sit and remember you, with love again
You stay on my mind
You haunt my days and nights
Your laughter fills my head
As I remember the days from beginning to end

Today, I hear your first cries
I smell the lavender scent from a recent bath
I hear your grunts as you try to move
I see the creases in your knees and elbows
As I remember the day you came home to me

Today, I hear the first words you spoke
I dread the times you repeated not so nice things
I hear your giggles as you played with teddy bears
I see the growth in you, not yet quite two
As I remember the days you were a toddler

Today, I hear the first time you said “No”
You looked so pleased with yourself
All serious and determined to win
I hear the word in disbelief and shock
That you would dare to talk back to me
As I remember the day at the park.

Today, I hear the first day of school
The echoes of “Mommy” I need more cookies
You wore a dress of blue and white
You looked so cute and suddenly I realized
You were growing up, faster than I hoped
As I remember the day I took you to Pre-K

Today, I hear the moans and groans of getting up
Time has flown by, faster than belief
Suddenly today, you are in middle school
Looking and talking non-stop, Momma this… Momma that
As I remember the day I realized you were growing up

Today, I hear the “No way” and “Momma Please”
Don’t make me go to that class today
You looked so scared, afraid of math
I remember the smell of the bath room
Because it feels my memory of your morning routine
As I remember the day your suddenly were growing up even faster

Today, I remember the “Momma, what do I do?”
I have a crush on Ryan McIntosh
He’s blue eyed and blonde, a perfect guy
Oh Momma what do I do?
Suddenly I realize you are no longer a little girl, but a teenager
As I remember that morning you declared your first crush

Today, I remember the times we fought
Simply because you thought you were grown up
Too old for me to tell you what to do, but too young to do it alone
I can hear your voice echoing down the hall, yelling Momma
He’s here, can I please go now.
As I remember your first date and how late you came in

Today, I remember my child
Gorgeous and outgoing, wild at times
A heart full of excitement, contagious to all
I can hear that laughter, the hurry up, let’s go
We’ve got to hurry, he’ll be there first
As I remember the day I saw you last

Today, I remember that fateful call
The one that ended my life as I knew it
The one that took my Angel away
The one that buried my soul so deep
The one that hurts still to this day
As I remember you, my long lost beautiful child

Today, I remember the hardest day of my life
The day I buried you and said my goodbyes
The day I cried and a part of me died
The day that should have never been
The day my little girl was laid to rest
As I remember you from the first day to the last

I love you my child more today than yesterday, and still you are alive in my heart.
4 Comments
Gardens of Life Jun 10, 2008 9:40 am
Mood: mellow, 320 Views
I was sitting here reading the blogs and I began to think about all the people you meet and let into your life here.

It reminded me of a garden of flowers. You know, like flowers, some of the people you meet are only around for certain periods of time, but you enjoy their beauty while they are here with you. They delight you with their colors, their prickly stems, and their delicate blooms.

Others, return year after year to give you continuous joy, laughter, beauty, tears, and often a new view on life. They entertain you always and share their lives with you.

For some reason today, my thoughts are on those in my garden, my garden of life, friends, who have added beautiful thoughts, color and inspiration to my life.

Without them, my garden would just be weeds.
3 Comments
My Special Thank You Jun 5, 2008 9:24 am
Mood: loved, 388 Views
How do I begin to say thank you to someone as special as you...

Thank you...

For making my days brighter, just because.
For making my nights, warmer with simple words.
For making my face light up with laughter.
For making my special days better by sharing them.

Thank you...

For making my life important to you.
For making my life richer by being my friend.
For making my life better by sharing yours.
For making my life happier by reminding me of yours.

Thank you...

For sharing my good times and yours.
For sharing my bad times and understanding.
For sharing my life, just as it is.
For sharing me as I really am.

Thank you...

For giving more than I deserve.
For giving me just what I need.
For giving me words to motivate me.
For giving me words to live by.

Thank you...

For making me want to be a better person.
For making me want to say where are you today.
For making me think of others, especially you.
For making me think how lucky I am to have you in my life.

Thank you...

For taking my scariest days and turning them pink.
For taking my fears and turning them to joy.
For taking my prayers and turning them to praise.
For taking my scars and making them beautiful lines.

Thank you...

For taking my Pink Stars and turning them to words of Gold.
For taking my Pink Stars and reminding me how bright they are.
For taking my Pink Stars and turning them to joys of my heart.
For taking my Pink Stars and capturing my soul.

Thank you... For being you!

Thank you for being who you are and sharing your life with me. You are truly special and the gift you gave me today was the greatest gift I've ever received. A true gift from the heart, one I'll cherish forever....

You know who you are and what all this really means. Thank you for everything. Especially my celebration of Pink Stars.
4 Comments
Can you say you are... Jun 4, 2008 2:00 pm
Mood: annoyed, 365 Views
Today I had this mind boggling experience with a total stranger and the only thing I could think of - Can you say you are a total jerk or what?

This day started out like a lot of other days do, get up, get showered and dressed, take care of Mollie (my dog) and off to work. It was a relatively calm morning until I got the commuter bus lot to pick up a friend so we could ride in together in my car since I had to leave early from work today.

For those that don't know what a daily commute is like - its a way to get to work with less stress and saves your car and money (especially these days with the price of gas). Anyway, over the years, you get to meet people and become friends with some, see the same people and learn their routines. You share a part of yourself with them each day - just a couple of hours.

The process is you have a pass or cash to ride. Usually, the men let the women get on first out of respect or just because they are an example of a great man. I'm happy to report my bus time has more great men than others! People over time become like family in some cases because you talk and laugh and enjoy the ride together.

Anyway, as I was waiting on my friend to arrive today, I noticed a new man ready to start the bus commute. At first I didn't pay much attention to him. He was standing off to the side smoking a cigarette as the line formed to get on the next approaching bus. Well, in a matter of a few minutes, this man of no consequence became a total jerk. He was rude to the lady in line first. She went to get on the bus and he shouted, hey I have to get on now. He almost knocked her down when he tried to get in front of her. Then when the other men said something to him, he literally wanted to fight. I was so shocked, I got out of my car so I could see what was happening.

In less time than most people can react, a undercover cop who rides our bus had the man on the ground, was radioing for help, the bus driver was upset, the women were upset and some I think probably afraid. In ten minutes the police arrived and the man began shouting and ranting about how he always got on first because he was a man and women have their place.

The only thing that comes to mind is... he must have been on drugs or something because I've never seen that happen at the bus lot before.

It made me realize how grateful I am that there are men out there who immediately prepare to take care of a situation and get women out of harm's way. Today, I applaud this man for his actions. He took charge when all I could think of Can you say nuts....

Have you ever wondered what makes people be so dang rude, mean or hateful to others? I have and I can't stand to witness it or hear it. People have forgotten how to be nice to others - isn't is sad.
4 Comments
Answered Prayers Jun 1, 2008 10:47 am
Mood: high, 373 Views
Ever wonder if God really answers your prayers? I did for a while and in fact, for a while wanted to know where he was and why wasn't he giving me answers.... the problem was, he was answering them, it was I just didn't like the answer and so I didn't listen.

Then, a few weeks ago, I was talking with a friend of mine and told her about one of my prayers. We laughed about it literally because she told me selfish prayers never get answered. Well, we parted ways for the day and the thought of selfish prayers stayed with me.

Later that night as I was writing in my journal I looked back over some of my prayers and realized that to some extent all prayers are selfish simply because no matter what you ask for is in some way selfish - something you want to happen. So, I really started to think about it...

That night I prayed for a good friend to come into my life and for that person to be someone who could really teach me something....

That night was four weeks ago... this week my prayer has been answered, I've met a really nice new friend, and even though they are 1,000 miles away, he touched my life in a way that no one else could just when I needed. He was my gift from God in answer to my selfish prayer.

Funny, but my selfish prayer for a great friend, was what I really needed and God gave me this person. I feel important with the person and I feel like no matter what the challenges may be to be friends, and remain friends due to distance, this person will remain a great treasure in my life because he was a blessing from God and an answer to my selfish prayer.

Today is a beautiful day just because my prayer was answered... not when I wanted it, but because it was the right time and the right person and God knew it.

May all of you have the courage to pray for strength and believe that prayers are answered, just sometimes we have to wait and listen for the answer... God does keep his word and he does provide just what we need... even selfish needs... if we have the courage to ask and wait...
5 Comments
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