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Can Americans Civilize Germany?
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Oct 8, 2007 10:21 am
Mood: overpowered,
863 Views
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My first order of business as the new governor of the new American colony of New Deutschland: I shall ban all saurkraut! My second act: All "frankfurters" shall NOW be called "hot dogs"! My third act: No soccer will be tolerated. All citizens of the new American colony of New Deutschland shall be instructed on how to speak American.
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4
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May I Dye Your Roots?
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Oct 8, 2007 9:48 am
Mood: flirtatious,
988 Views
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 , I wonder...is it time for me to dye your roots? Shall I trim your BANGS?. Are you STILL growing it for me? Is it still getting LONGER???
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10
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I Broke up a CATFIGHT!
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Oct 6, 2007 9:13 am
Mood: sensual,
837 Views
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I heard the two cats meowing loudly at each other, Then they appeared in my headiights crouched down and staring at each other along side the road. As I drove by, the orange cat darted away and then the brown cat sulked off, her TAIL quite SWOLLEN! The sight of that swollen tail was almost enough to make me get hard. Later that night, I met up with a beautiful LONG HAIRED black cat. I had a great time stroking her back and her head. As I was about to go to work on her TAIL, her owner came out.
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9
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Women are the Silliest People!
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Oct 5, 2007 10:28 am
Mood: amused,
928 Views
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I watch the "Lifetime Channel" occassionally. They do have a few good shows on, like "Frasier". I watch some of their murder mysteries too, but I wonder: Why is the music on 90% of the programs so SILLY? The background music on "The History Channel" or "Spike TV" is normal but when you listen to the background music on "Lifetime", it sounds like baby music. The melodies might be considered appropriate in a baby crib or playpen, but it is hilarious that grown females are being fed this stuff! It is very distracting and sometimes makes me laugh out loud. And the commercials are just as bad (although I will concede that the commercials on "Spike TV" are equally as bad).
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8
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Balty Takes a Strol Through Mayberry
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Oct 4, 2007 10:56 am
Mood: thoughtful,
955 Views
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Balty pulls up to the filling station.
"Fill 'er up, mister?", Goober asks.
"Yeah. Regular, please".
"I ain't never seen a vehicle like this before around these parts. Check your oil?"
"Yeah, and do the windshield. I'm gonna get a bottle of pop."
"Mister...where's the carburator at?"
"No carburator. It's fuel injection"
"Gee whiz"
Balty pays Goober $1.35 and cruises down Main Street in Mayberry. Barney Fife frantically blows his whistle at three boys who speed down the sidewalks on bicycles, nearly running him down. Balty parks in front of Floyd's Barber Shop.
"Ehhh...ehhh...Andy! Andy!", Floyd stammers. Look at that car. It looks like somethin' from the 21st century!"
""Well look at that! It sure does, Floyd. You know, it looks like one of them newfangled machines that they're buildin' down at Cape Caneveral!", Andy responds. Andy and Floyd stand around the vehicle staring at it. Barny stands in the middle of the street, his whistle dropping from his mouth as he studies the car.
"Welcome to Mayberry. You gonna be in town for long?", Andy asks?
"My name's Balty. Just passin' through for a visit."
"You must be from up North. Andy, I think he came down from Baltimore!", Barney shouts
"Eh...eh...Balty...I was in Raliegh last month. I know how it is in the big city. They have a barber shop with FIVE CHAIRS down there!", Floyd responds.
"Balty, were you plannin' on stayin in town overnight?", Andy asks.
"Yes, Andy. Could you recommend a good hotel and a restaurant?"
"You know, Balty, I was just thinkin...how would you like commin over to my place for supper this evening? My aunt Bea is a fine cook."
"I AM gettin' a little hungry, Andy. I haven't had anything all day except for this bottle of pop that I got at the fillin' station."
MORE on this later.....
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11
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328 More to GO and I'll Catch up With jake_633!!!
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Oct 4, 2007 10:30 am
Mood: excited,
839 Views
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I am gradually catching up with that woodland creatures blog but the progress has slowed down now that I have lost my computer and can only get online forbrief periods at the public library. But I am now only 328 posts away from actching up with his total number of posts. The ONE problem is that HE keeps adding new posts too, so its NOT like I have a static number to catch up with. So...I'll need tocome up with LOTS of new ideas for original posts. I'm NOT gonna cheat and just post something about SARAH'S LOCK of HAIR every day.
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8
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USE THIS BLING!
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Oct 2, 2007 2:01 pm
Mood: giddy,
1094 Views
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 It looks kind of like a TAIL. But it is actually a tornado. I am giving this bling to ALL of you. All you have to do is type [ bling 4673 ] in your posts and a little tornado bling will show up!
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19
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To link to this blog (debutanteBaltimr) use [blog debutanteBaltimr] in your messages.
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