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So Baaad...
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Aug 25, 2009 11:23 am
765 Views
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Bob Hill and his new wife Betty were vacationing in Europe, as it
happens, near Transylvania. They were driving in a rental car along a rather deserted highway..It was late and raining very hard. Bob could hardly see the road in front of the car. Suddenly the car skids out of control. Bob attempts to control the car, but to no avail. The car swerves and smashes into a tree.
Moments later, Bob shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger seat and sees his wife unconscious, with her head bleeding! Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows he has to get her medical assistance.
Bob carefully picks his wife up and begins trudging down the road.
After a short while, he sees a light. He heads toward the light,
which is coming from a large, old castle. He approaches the door and knocks.
A minute passes. A small, hunched man opens the door. Bob immediately blurts, "Hello, my name is Bob Hill, and this is my wife Betty. We've been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone?
"I'm sorry, replied the hunchback, but we don't have a phone. My master is a doctor, come in and I will get him!" Bob brings his wife in.
An older man comes down the stairs. "I'm afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor; I am a scientist. However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had basic medical training. I will see what I can do. Igor, bring them down to the laboratory."
With that, Igor picks up Betty and carries her downstairs, with Bob following closely. Igor places Betty on a table in the lab. Bob collapses from exhaustion and his own unrealized injuries, so Igor places Bob on an adjoining table.
After a brief examination, Igor's master looks worried, "Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion." Igor and his master work feverishly, but to no avail. Bob and Betty are no more.
The Hills' deaths upset Igor's master greatly. Wearily, he climbs the steps to his conservatory, which houses his grand piano. For it is here that he has always found solace. He begins to play, and a stirring, almost haunting melody fills the house.
Meanwhile, Igor is still in the lab tidying up. His eyes catch movement, and he notices the fingers on Betty's hand twitch, keeping time to the haunting piano music..stunned, he watches as Bob's arm begins to rise, marking the beat! He is further amazed as Betty and Bob both sit up straight!
Unable to contain himself, he dashes up the stairs to the conservatory.
He bursts in and shouts to his master;
"Master, Master!..The Hills are alive with the sound of music!"
So Baaad~I warned you! 
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8
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OMG!
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Aug 25, 2009 2:35 am
696 Views
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Brigit woke me up this morning(4:30 a.m.)chewing on a plastic bag that I had washed and was air~drying. There's something about her and plastic, though I have never been able to find out WHY. I was dreaming about piles and piles and piles of mens shirts, washed, but needing to be ironed. The pile was way up in the air! I'm just real thankful that I didn't have to be the one to iron them all..or..DID I?!  ha!ha!ha!
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2
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BEFORE MARRIAGE..AFTER MARRIAGE
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Aug 19, 2009 11:31 am
627 Views
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John-Ah..At last, I can hardly wait! 
Jane-Do you want me to leave?
John-NO! Don't even think about it.
Jane-Do you love me?
John-Of course! Always have and always will!
Jane-Have you ever cheated on me?
John-NO! Why are you even asking?
Jane-Will you kiss me?
John-Every chance I get!
Jane-Will you disrespect me?
John-Hell no! Are you crazy?!
Jane-Can I trust you?
John-Yes
Jane-Darling!
AFTER MARRIAGE;
Read from the bottom, back to the top!
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12
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Docs Advice..
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Aug 18, 2009 9:47 am
459 Views
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A middle aged man goes into the doctor's office for a check-up with a litany of complaints.
The doctor speaks to the man's wife alone and says, "There is nothing wrong with your husband. Make a couple of meals for him a day..let him watch his sports..do not complain about him too much
..or require him to listen..limit his exposure to the in-laws, and make love to him once a week. Then, he'll probably live another 20 years."
She returns to her husband's side in the waiting room. He asks, "What did the doctor tell you?"
"You are going to be dying soon, my dear."
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10
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Losses
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Aug 6, 2009 5:03 pm
530 Views
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The death of a relationship is a kind of death, recent articles are suggesting that it's 'right up there'(stress~wise) with losing your beloved to death. The reason being is that both are
extremely painful losses, and the soul doesn't care WHY the person is gone, only that they ARE.
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note; notice the muted images of a couple behind the dying leaves~
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15
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A Silent Bomb In Church
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Aug 5, 2009 6:13 am
521 Views
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An elderly couple were in church. The wife leaned over and whispered to her husband, "I just let out a long silent fart..
what should I do?"
The husband replied, "replace the batteries in your hearing aid!"
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10
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Yum!!
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Aug 1, 2009 11:29 am
532 Views
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It had finally cooled down a bit here, so I cranked up the oven and made lasagna for dinner last night. It was the BEST that I have EVER made..of course, it didn't hurt that I used 1 1/2 lbs. of extra sharp cheese in it, did it?  I made a caesar salad to accompany it, followed a few hours later by dessert, and was that also delicious! Fat free, chocolate fudge brownie, Breyer's ice cream, and you could NOT tell that this ice cream was fat free. Scary almost. The only thing missing, and that would have made dinner that much more special, was someone to share it with. On second thought here..all the more for me!!
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18
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'Hanging It Up'
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Aug 1, 2009 10:39 am
446 Views
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The photo posted here is of community clotheslines in Bombay.
Would that everyone around the world that possibly could, would do the same, whether it be as a community or individually. Think of what the 'savings' would be to our environment, not to mention our wallets, if we were to go back to the days of drying things on an outdoor clothesline and/or a wooden drying rack..it boggles the mind..
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'Green' things I currently do, that most of us could easily do, at
least in our worlds more prosperous countries;
Recycle as much as I possibly can(bottles, plastics, paper, glass, aluminum, cardboard, etc;
Share things with others who might want/need it..clothing, furniture, food, etc;
Donate clean, usable, working items to reputable charity organizations.
Sell 'high~ticket' items.
Reduce all of the above by being a more thoughtful, thus careful
consumer.
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The end result is far less garbage in our landfills, and THAT is FINALLY getting on the RIGHT track. 
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8
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The Most Important Lessons Of All
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Jul 29, 2009 6:50 am
523 Views
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If we don't learn from our past lessons we will repeat them. I believe that we are souls in physical bodies, learning through experiencing. The earth is our school, and life is our teacher. How much or how little we learn, depends solely on us, as we are given free choice. Those souls that haven't as yet learned from their lessons will return here time and again until they too finally learn. Free choice to learn what we are meant to learn here, the most important lessons of all, unconditional love.. happiness..peace..compassion..& forgiveness, the very essence of what the Universe created us to be.
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6
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Did You Know..
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Jul 28, 2009 10:53 am
489 Views
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that the opposite of love isn't hate?
It's indifference.
How sad, when it was once love..
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note; photo shows woman on right standing and facing toward man sitting on left with his back to her, being indifferent..
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8
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