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 | Blogs > Ari_fairy > Ari-Wood > Being Thankful |
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When sunset came tonight I stopped what I was doing and went outside to watch it. It always amazes me when the brilliant ball of light descends over the edge of the mountains behind the house and the sky lights with the soft purples and salmons that herald the coming of night. I'm not much of a sunrise person...believing that it is immoral...and almost criminal...to be up at the butt crack of dawn. I wish that I could share these moments with you...with each one of you...the moments in which we stop, take a step back, and appreciate all that has been offered to us. We often become so jaded and so harried that we cannot take those precious instants to not only view the beauty we are surrounded by....but we do not stop to offer up thanks for gifts given. Sometimes those gifts are very simple. The colors of a sunrise or sunset; the laughter of a child heard from a distance; the singing of the birds as they pass the day searching for food; the sound of a voice which brings love into your sphere. Other gifts are much more complex. Kelly is one of my very closest friends and there isn't much in either of our lives we don't share with one another. In the past few weeks she has often paused to remind me that when we approach the universe with an open heart....the gifts we are meant to have are given. Although I believe in the power of positive thinking and visualization....I often struggle with the concept that the gifts I hunger for most will ever be given to me. Even when I can see the road before me....still I often anticipate pitfalls in the road. This has been my path for too long. These days I find it much easier to believe and accept, but when it is a gift that fills my entire soul with anticipation....still do I struggle. It makes Kelly laugh when she tells me to expect....specific things...and I fail to follow through on them. I have to analyze the likelihood that they will actually occur...and if I conclude that it is unlikely....I step away from the path and wait. The end result is that I am often scrambling to catch up to where I should have been had I only taken the message given and listened carefully. Stop laughing, Kelly....I heard enough of it tonight. Chelle and I spoke tonight of how our expectations often come to be exactly as we expect them. I have a friend who is very cautious with money, preferring to hold it close and guard it. That's usually a result of not having had enough...and I know that because I've been there for most of my life. I've struggled to just keep a roof over my head...not worrying about food...that's ancillary. Today, I don't worry nearly as much because I learned a valuable lesson. I learned that I can make it if I only believe I can make it. For years I was the primary or sole support of my family. As a young woman, that was a complicated place to be and we often struggled just to make it through each day, not to mention each week. As time passed I learned to be stronger, smarter, more dedicated...and gradually my earning capacity improved. I also learned that when I need to do so...I can work more than one job at a time...and I can do the unpleasant jobs...cleaning other people's houses comes to mind. It's not fun scrubbing their messes up. I've done that when I've needed to make things work...and I've been very proud of how successful I was at making that job into a small business for myself. These days I don't think about money as much. Don't get me wrong, I still prefer to save as much as I can...and I can be extremely tight-fisted...but I've also learned that being tight is not always the answer. When I buy the cheapest products...I often get what I pay for. When I buy the most expensive products....I often pay for name recognition. By researching my purchases carefully and buying for the best quality I can comfortably afford....I usually have a product that will last me three to four times as long as the least expensive model. This is the range I buy in. I prefer to pay cash for everything I buy...and I'm very careful about getting into debt. I'd love to have a newer car...but my car gets me around just fine and I really don't want a car payment. That's the cheap side of me. I'd love to buy a small truck...but when I can afford to pay cash for it...that will be soon enough to buy one. Until then, I'll borrow one as I need it. I haven't forgotten where I'm going with this...I'm just being circular....as I often am. Through experience in the past six years, I've learned that if I believe I will get through and there will be enough money to deal with what I need to deal with....without going crazy with spending....it happens just as I believe. When I begin to worry about where the next dollar is coming from...when I begin to think my bank balances are getting too low...things happen and they get lower. It seems to be a matter of the universe giving me...what I expect. I don't believe this is just true of finances...but of everything in life. What we expect...is what we are given. If we expect people to be our friends...they usually are. If we expect our jobs to be successful....they usually are. I still have to apply myself...but I also expect to be successful at what I am doing. That expectation carries through to each subsequent transaction. My work is successful, my job is successful, financially I have few serious concerns. We can't simply expect the end result without expecting and visualizing all the steps in between. We have to truly believe in each of those steps. And to be honest...it helps if we begin each day offering up thanks and gratitude for all that we have already been given. Some days that's the hardest part. Maybe I'm so tired I don't really care...but I try hard each day to be thankful for the simplest thing first...and build up to the rest. I'm thankful I have this toothbrush and the toothpaste and water to brush my teeth. Sounds silly, doesn't it? I'm thankful my teeth are healthy. I'm thankful I can afford to go see the dentist to keep my teeth healthy. I'm thankful for this wonderful house I love so much. I'm thankful for the opportunity to learn how to fix and remodel it. I'm thankful for the job that allows me to pay to fix and remodel it....I could continue forever...and I do within my own mind. Until I reach my office, I am often busy whispering thanks to a very generous universe. Don't the simple things matter as much as the complex things? These past few months I've focused on learning to give thanks for more personal gifts. I'm thankful for the freedom I feel each morning as I wake up. I'm thankful for the lack of confrontation in my life. I'm thankful for the love that entered my life and filled me so completely with simple joy. I'm thankful for each moment I have to share with the people I love....and so on. In the process, I'm also trying to focus on the idea that I have the right to expect these things to be as true for me as financial independence. That's harder. I really don't believe I have a right to expect anything good to happen in my personal life. I really don't believe I am the least bit loveable. Still, each time I focus on these thoughts...they become just a little easier to believe...just a little easier to be positive about...just a little easier to accept. And in the end...I think that's how it's meant to be....one small step at a time along a path of learning and enlightenment. What do you have to be thankful for? And do you stop each day and offer up thanks to whatever higher power you believe in? Do you believe you deserve the gifts given? If not...what do you believe? Feel the passion, walk in peace, live in love....Ari 
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7/28/2008 1:00 am |
Inspirational post! Sunsets are absolutely the best! The focus comes off the day just past, and on to ..just pure awe. It puts the days irritations and highlights into perspective...and provides calm. Not being a morning person (LO  , sunrises have only been experienced rarely: youthful romantic excursions onto the beach (very few!)..... the first 2 years of my son's life...waiting out the last breaths of my mothers life. Yet I'm thankful for each and every sunrise, knowing that each one brings me a day closer to my goals, however minor or silly they may seem to anyone else. Your last two Q's are not as simple as they seem....I need to think on them....Thank you for your testimonial....I feel truly humbled by your kind words. You are a very special lady.
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7/28/2008 3:07 am |
I think we should show thanks in a ceremony to show people we really mean it. It's too easy to say thanks at the checkout, or when we receive a gift. The Pagans had the right idea.. offer a few sacrifices in the hope that the Sun will return or the ice would melt. Or hoping somebody installs a Sushi belt in my kitchen. ** guaranteed Goody free **
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7/28/2008 7:06 am |
Ari, very nice post. You have really come a long way and I'm glad of where you are headed. Thanks to your friend Kel. I am thankful for being able to pass every minute every day. To look back and see how far I have come. Thankful for the opportunities I have, which include; perfecting and working on my life in general. Thanks Ari
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 7/28/2008 5:22 pm |
hi ari, beautiful post. I am thankful for much in my life, and am now getting past what I thought I didn't have. I now have a wonderful partner to help show me what I do have. one thing tho.... this sunrise butt crack of dawn thingie... it is then, when the sun begins to rise, the same beautiful colors of the sunsets, that all the birds begin to come alive and greet their day, and maybe? sing their songs of joy. in other words...it's ALL good! once an oldhoglover, always an oldhoglover!
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7/29/2008 9:02 pm |
Ari... again your words humble me and remind me of what I should be concentrating on, rather than stressing about inconsequentials of the moment. We have money worries these days, and I keep expect another shoe to drop so to speak, and what do you know? Another one does. We can never seem to actually get ahead, but we expect to never be able to get ahead, so again that's a lesson I can take to bed (hey I am a poet and I didn't know it...lol) Thank you for this. The weird light I mentioned in daisy's blog? it was sunset, but there was no sun, there was an ominous cloud and the day had been gray and cool. Suddenly I looked up from writing on here, and there was the light reflecting off the storm cloud, almost like a silver lining. Tomorrow morning when I awake, I promise you and most of all I promise myself, to take 5 mins to be thankful for the health of my children, the love of my husband ever unwavering, for the health and strength of my body, for my ability to make most situations lighter and more funner ( there is something wrong with that...lol) Most of all, I will stop expecting the worst Sensy between the stars, beyond the planet mars, there Sens will be
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7/30/2008 10:31 pm |
Dear AriI have my good days, and bad ones,just like we all do, but every day, i am thankful to have a family who loves me, and accepts the way i am,they don't try to change me,always been there for me, no matter what...i'm grateful for having a handful of true friends,some no longer with me,but i still love them and miss them, learned very important things about life from them...grateful to be able to look up at the night sky,and see a thousand stars,to hear the sounds of nature on a summer's night...for the few "material items' i have,knowing that i worked hard to have them,nothing was handed to me the easy way...for all my pets,over the years,this i am grateful for,they made me a better person...so thankful,that i am not the bitter and angry person,i once was...finally,i am thankful that there are still good decent people in the world,who are genuine and caring, these people give us hope,at times when it seems all is lost in this world
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