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 | Blogs > Whatsherface > WhatsTheBeef? > Prey's Anatomy |
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I've mentioned that I detest doctors. This was instilled in me even before I worked with them. One of my earliest "real" jobs entailed consulting to doctors and the medical industry. It meant I spent a lot of time in hospitals and in the company of doctors. You hear and see a lot about the medical profession that takes away any desire to enter a hospital unless you are almost on death's bed ... when you know they might well finish the job. There are the medical students who pay about 3 pennies per cadaver, if it is a "nice one" with fully formed muscles and fairly newly harvested, and complain about the lack of female cadavers. You hesitate to ask why they want a female one. They chop off hands and feet and place these in hapless students' beds as a prank. They force the cadavers upright to use coat and bag hangers. They hang bags of fruits from the wrists and other parts. You really realise that life is cheap but death is even cheaper. When they graduate, they are not much better. There was once a very high ranking specialist from the largest hospital who used to visit my office every afternoon, six days a week. He was a very lonely man married to a woman whom everyone knew only wanted his money and spent all her time with her dance and singing instructors. Who were coincidentally male, young and seemingly single. He was a big, fat bloke with a cantankerous, foul temper and a sarky sense of humour. I liked him. He would lumber into my office every day, Mondays to Fridays, at around 3pm after lunch and his rounds. Clutching the local tabloids and a plastic bag of wrestling videos, he would plant himself in one of the chairs outside my room and start asking everyone what they were doing. He spent hours in our office till he had to go home to an empty house where he would read his papers and watch his wrestling videos. Then he would have dinner and wait for his wife to come home. Most nights he would pretend to be asleep if she stumbled in smelling of thick perfume and smoke in the wee hours of the morning. We never let on we knew that this was his daily routine. At about 3.30pm, he would decide I had ignored his presence long enough and yell for me to make his coffee. I had made the mistake of making him a cuppa once when the usual assistant was out of the office. He declared it just the way he liked it and refused to let anyone make him a cup of coffee anymore. Apparently he even refused to drink coffee if I was not in the office and would wait for me to return. When I was out of the country, he would torture the poor assistant till she cried over her poor coffee-making skills. Yes, the man was an inveterate bully. He seemed to like me for some reason and loved ribbing and teasing me. We shared the same birthday and celebrated together every year I was with that company - that perhaps made him feel a bond with me. He also demanded that I had lunch with him every Saturday before I left for the day and once told my then-boyfriend that he had to wait his turn to see me. One day, he was regaling us with some gossip (he loved his gossip) when his pager beeped insistently. He picked up one of the phones to call back and we saw his eyes widen, him start from the chair and dash out of our office with a hurried, "Gotta go!" Stunned, we concluded that a patient must have been on the verge of death to require such swift movement from the usually slothlike professor. At around 5pm, he returned, smiling gleefully and with a naughty glint his eyes. We asked him if the patient was alright. Huh? What patient? Didn't you run out to attend to some dying patient? It seemed so urgent. Oh, no, no! He giggled like a giddy schoolboy. The call was from another doctor in a nearby hospital. A plastic surgeon. A mate, obviously. Who'd called because he had entered his operating room to see a famous female singer on his operating table. She was there for a boob job. So he made a call to all his doctor mates to tell them he had Ms So-and-so-Diva with her breasts literally in his hands. And he invited them all to rush over to have a look at them. Before and after. So, a bunch of middle-aged doctors drove in droves to see this clueless songstress' tits while she lay trustingly to enhance her image. A year or so later, I met her in a club. It was incredibly hard for me not to stare at her tits the whole night. I was so embarrassed and mortified for her and she must have been wondering why I kept averting my eyes from her chest area. I was never totally comfortable with her after that as the memory of her humiliation and violation always preyed on my mind. When some doctors tried to set me up with some of the younger residents and specialists, I flat out refused. The coffee-loving physician also vetoed the idea. He glared at all would-be matchmakers and applicants and declared, She is too good for you lot. She would be better off with a street vendor from the alleys of Calcutta than us doctors. Physician, know thyself. Why this post? Because someone is trying to set me up with a doctor and could not understand my resolute refusal. It's a good thing I leave this afternoon. In the immortal words from 6th Sense ... I see stupid people. |
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5/7/2008 11:03 pm |
And I thought we lawyers were bad. There was a recent medical scandal here involving a man who, for one reason or another, shoved a plastic bottle of spray on perfume/deodorant up him bum, and couldn't retrieve it, so he ended up in the Operating Room to get it extracted. Someone with a phone camera in the OR was able to videotape the doctors who were attending to this hapless patient while they sniggered over the deodorant bottle, made homophobic jokes and generally maligned the poor bloke lying there senseless. To top it off, after they extracted the bottle, they went around spraying each other with the contents. The video ended up on yew tube, and the doctors involved are now under investigation. I'm dyslexic. I scream Ho Dog instead of Oh God in the throes of passion.
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5/8/2008 2:37 am |
up his* bum, even. ($#$&#*$# typo) I'm dyslexic. I scream Ho Dog instead of Oh God in the throes of passion.
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 5/8/2008 5:56 am |
Haven't been to a doctor in close to three decades. It's a shame. They sound like a fun lot. Enjoy the ride. All you take with you when you leave is the experience.
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5/8/2008 6:44 am |
My eyeballs nearly rushed themselves out of the eye sockets on learning how the doctors humiliate the body and that female singer!!! That's immoral to the fullest meaning! *shudder* Agnes
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5/8/2008 8:00 am |
Strange, by the way, "Prey's Anatomy" reminds me of "Grey's Anatomy". Actually I used to like watching the latter very much. Agnes
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5/8/2008 8:27 am |
The only GOOD doctor...is one who shall FREELY prescribe opiates. I know what you mean about them, though. I was once a guinea pig at a clinic that was testing a new medicine and one of the doctors was bragging about his video collection...of PEOPLE having sex with ANIMALS. (This is more offensive to me than a snuff video).
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5/8/2008 10:52 am |
Couldn't think of anything worse than dating a Doctor. They are a pretentious lot - well all the ones I know are anyway. And ewwwww to being oggled at when under the knife. Ain't anything private anymore?
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5/8/2008 1:07 pm |
And I thought we lawyers were bad. There was a recent medical scandal here involving a man who, for one reason or another, shoved a plastic bottle of spray on perfume/deodorant up him bum, and couldn't retrieve it, so he ended up in the Operating Room to get it extracted. Someone with a phone camera in the OR was able to videotape the doctors who were attending to this hapless patient while they sniggered over the deodorant bottle, made homophobic jokes and generally maligned the poor bloke lying there senseless. To top it off, after they extracted the bottle, they went around spraying each other with the contents. The video ended up on yew tube, and the doctors involved are now under investigation. I am eating a couple of the Krispie Kremes. Paul and I just hung out at the cafe with my friend Justine (yes, Paul remarked on the coincidence) and we learnt a lot of new things from Justine tonight. I also learnt I will never ever eat balut. Eeeuuwwww! In the immortal words from 6th Sense ... I see stupid people.
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5/8/2008 1:08 pm |
Haven't been to a doctor in close to three decades. It's a shame. They sound like a fun lot.  In the immortal words from 6th Sense ... I see stupid people.
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5/8/2008 1:10 pm |
Strange, by the way, "Prey's Anatomy" reminds me of "Grey's Anatomy". Actually I used to like watching the latter very much. I do not watch soaps and cannot watch shows featuring blood and people getting cut up. Funnily enough I am OK with horror movies but not any kind of medical drama. Which is also odd as I have no problems cutting up and watching autopsies. In the immortal words from 6th Sense ... I see stupid people.
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5/8/2008 1:12 pm |
The only GOOD doctor...is one who shall FREELY prescribe opiates. I know what you mean about them, though. I was once a guinea pig at a clinic that was testing a new medicine and one of the doctors was bragging about his video collection...of PEOPLE having sex with ANIMALS. (This is more offensive to me than a snuff video). In the immortal words from 6th Sense ... I see stupid people.
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5/8/2008 1:15 pm |
Couldn't think of anything worse than dating a Doctor. They are a pretentious lot - well all the ones I know are anyway. And ewwwww to being oggled at when under the knife. Ain't anything private anymore? I once left a broker at the dinner table during a date and he did not notice for hours! He was so busy closing deals he thought I was in the loo when I had buggered off. But yes, a lot of doctors are terribly pretentious. In the immortal words from 6th Sense ... I see stupid people.
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5/8/2008 6:44 pm |
Oh I could tell you more stories including one about a girl who went for an abortion and ... well, it's too upsetting ... I am eating a couple of the Krispie Kremes. Paul and I just hung out at the cafe with my friend Justine (yes, Paul remarked on the coincidence) and we learnt a lot of new things from Justine tonight. I also learnt I will never ever eat balut. Eeeuuwwww! Strange why Singapore doesn't have much in the way of doughnut shops. How can they call themselves civilized when they don't even have a KK outlet??? Or at least a Dunkin Donuts?? But hey, I'd kill to have a laksa from 328 Katong right now. I'm dyslexic. I scream Ho Dog instead of Oh God in the throes of passion.
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5/8/2008 7:36 pm |
That's because I promised Azahlia that I would give her some and she can pick which ones she wants. After that if there are any left over, I will share them with Justine and D. I am giving some to Aunt F as she is pouting over the last visit still. Am having lunch with her today to pacify her. Did Paul tell you what Z did? In the immortal words from 6th Sense ... I see stupid people.
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5/8/2008 7:56 pm |
That's because I promised Azahlia that I would give her some and she can pick which ones she wants. After that if there are any left over, I will share them with Justine and D. I am giving some to Aunt F as she is pouting over the last visit still. Am having lunch with her today to pacify her. Did Paul tell you what Z did? Paul told me he staggered back to his hotel room past 3 AM, too.  I'm dyslexic. I scream Ho Dog instead of Oh God in the throes of passion.
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5/8/2008 9:21 pm |
Well, Z apparently threatened the restaurant and lied that Princess F is under contract to her and cannot dance for them without her permission. She told them that she would create scenes and apparently the woosy manager, who is almost a 6-footer, was "intimidated by her aggressive behaviour". So they called Princess F and told her they were cancelling her contract as they just do not want to have to deal with Z coming down on them all the time. Princess F is livid and really upset as now she has no place to teach since she has totally cut all ties with Z and she has no performance gigs. Z is set on destroying her livelihood. I was supposed to be there yesterday but because of all the brouhaha and because Z is out on the rampage to find out who the guest foreign dancer is, they cancelled yesterday's show and tonight's is in another private location so Z cannot turn up and wreck the place and event. Yeah, I tried not to keep Paul up too late but you know how the cafe is. No one ever comes and leaves quickly. LOL. I will try not to keep him up too late tonight. Poor man might not be able to survive it. In the immortal words from 6th Sense ... I see stupid people.
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5/8/2008 10:35 pm |
Feck, poor Princess F---gads, can't someone have Z committed in an asylum? The woman's unhinged. Aw, Paul's having fun---said it was great just talking with you guys. I'm picking him up Saturday night from the airport and we're going straight to dinner. I'm trying not to pout over the fried mee suah. I might actually do a Krispy Kreme run myself later just as a pick-me-up (Yeah, I know, as if I need any excuse to pig out  )I'm dyslexic. I scream Ho Dog instead of Oh God in the throes of passion.
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5/8/2008 11:17 pm |
It gets worse. Her personal life is even more fecked up. She really does need help. Will ask Paul to take piccies of the fried mee suah. We're having ngoh hiang, then mee suah and then if we can still move, we are going to dessert. In the immortal words from 6th Sense ... I see stupid people.
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