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feck my blogs have gone all girlie So in Spain, each village has its own patron saint and the patron saint of frigiliana is Antonio, and each year on saints day , all the village go down to the river, bbq a pig, drink lots of beer and wine get drunk fall over and go to sleep and go home the next day. Now this I understand because its kinda fun, unless you happen to be the pig. But what I cant understand is that they all call their sons Antonio, you see you go into a bar and say hola Antonio, and every body answers back. So as always the Spanish have a solution they have nick names, so this is how it works, one of the Antonio’s is called chow, because he shagged a Italian women once, and she left him without saying goodbye So today im going to tell you about my mate Antonio aka el canerio now he got his nickname cos he spent his time in the army, in the special forces in the caneries nothing special or covert, its just he was good with animals so they got him to look after the horses. Now he’s one of these blokes you cant tell how old he is, I guess in his mid sixties, but he could be 50 or he could be 80, and he wont tell me. Most of the time he looks like a long hair going a bit grey and a huge beard and the next day he will look like this incredible handsome film star , basted, he’s already quite famous many English papers have written about him, when they done their reviews on this village. He’s never married and never wanted too, clever bloke then, So once he had a cat, called cat, and when this cat was hungry it came to the bar and started to shout at canrio I want my dinner sort of thing, so canario used to shout at in words that even the Spanish could not understand and the cat went home, being a butch Spanish man he just used to say phaaa gatos, and then five minutes later sneaked out to feed it. He also had a dog, called dog, well it wont his, it belonged to this English woman who was his lover, now this English woman is posh, real posh, with lots of dosh and she used to come to the village 3 times a year to shag canerio, you always knew when she was coming cos the went to the poodle parlour and canrio used to have his hair cut and a shave and put on this suite. and this was twice as bad as mutley, once when I was looking after this small dog, I was taking it for a walk on a lead, I stopped to talked to canario and looked down and his was shagging this little dog, later she had 3 lovely puppies. I could go on for ever about him, but I wont, so quickly canerio likes to drink, and gets pissed a lot and falls over, but hes never any trouble, you just take him home, and he starts again the next day. He would knock on your door at 7 in the morning, pissed, hola Ricardo ive got some fresh eggs for you, give them to you and try to walk home. and all you could do is stand there speechless, while the bag of eggs just dripped on your feet. Now his house, well he had one in the middle of the village, wow, you could not get in the door, for the bits he’s got. Some developer wanted it so he swapped it for a apartment with a swimming pool, fleck I went round there once, and there was this hairy thing with dirty underpants on laying by the pool, with the posh English. Now , feck knows how, has this big house in the country, that used to be a mill for the olive oil, and his house is over the house of my lawyer, and he has pigs and chickens, yep you guessed in his house. He is the neibour from hell Today I was in the village, in my car, just waiting for something, and I saw this guy walking down the hill, I know him he’s a artist, nice bloke, and had his work exhibited in the national gallery, 6 months ago he had a stroke, and has been ill, now he was a neibour of canerio, and fell out with him big time, well any one would have, and caused canerio lots of trouble, and I don’t blame him. Anyway this bloke lost control and was about to fall over, and do you know who rushed over the street to save him, yep my mate el canerio You know, im proud to say he’s my mate, but id hate it if he was my fecking neibour. Feck my blogs have gone all girlie, im going back to insulting the pope and the Americans. Hey, perhaps ive found my girlie side |
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2/26/2008 7:14 am |
Menudo maricon te has hecho, tío. Although, having said that, one of my best friends is a butcher and we kiss on both cheeks when we meet, so I can't really talk. I said butcher, as in carnicero, not butch.
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Are you sure frigiliana is a town and not just an instruction?
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2/26/2008 7:52 am |
Are you sure frigiliana is a town and not just an instruction?
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2/26/2008 10:09 am |
Menudo maricon te has hecho, tío. Although, having said that, one of my best friends is a butcher and we kiss on both cheeks when we meet, so I can't really talk. I said butcher, as in carnicero, not butch.
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I actually have a friend named Maria Concepcion, who abhorred being called Maricon for short, as we all know what THAT means. A lot of Anas there, aye? I'd fit right in, but not as a maricon either. Take the girdle off, you'd feel mucho macho. I'm dyslexic. I scream Ho Dog instead of Oh God in the throes of passion.
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2/27/2008 5:55 am |
LOL!!!...just another day?.....LOL!!!
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