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I need some help, UGH! You know, a friend of mine told me to write stuff in here that was upbeat. Not to write things that seemed as if I was down or feeling bad. I can understand that, but what if I really had a bad time about something or wanted to get something out in the open so I would feel better? This is my blog, right? I can tell what I want and if it happens to be sad, then it is. Better times will follow... So, that being said, yea, I guess you could see it coming, but I have to get this out of my head, maybe some of you can give me your thoughts and encouragement. I have told all that I was divorced, well, since Monday I can honestly say that I am divorced. It is something that has been in the works for about 4 years, but became final this week. To tell you the truth, I had been just tweedling along, floating on a cloud, until this week. I can't explain the loss that I am feeling, it really pisses me off. I feel as though something inside of me has died, but I am ready to move on! I had a couple of friends say that I was going to go through a grieving process as though my spouse passed away. I don't know about that, but we were together for such a long time, maybe? Her and I started dating when I was 16 years old. We dated for 7 years then were married for 19. I have to tell you that most of the marriage was unhappy, but we were still together. I am not unfaithful, nor have I ever been, but this feeling I am having is quite unsettling. Would someone please wave a magic wand over me and make this go away? Then you have to throw Valentines Day into the mix. I'm a romantic and this is the first time in the last 26 years that I didn't have someone to pamper, to be with. Ugh! This sucks! I hate feeling this way, but I had to get it off my chest. I know there are better roads ahead! Thanks for stopping by all! Joe |
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2/16/2007 4:40 pm |
Hi Joe, I agree with Mary this is your space and you can write what is on your heart. You do have friends, let them be a support. And yes...do something nice for you! Praying for peace, to heal the broken heart you are carrying inside. Hugs Chelle Good things come to those who wait; remember to live while you do the waiting!! ~*Michelle*~
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2/16/2007 6:43 pm |
Its your blog, write what you please. Sometimes writing and getting your feelings out makes you feel alot better about things. Having been divorced twice already myself.........yes, no matter how long you'd been together, or how bad things were, there is a greiving period. My ex got addicted to cocaine, and became more mentally abusive in the end then physically abusive. Even after the treatment he gave me, when I got out......I found I greived, went through all the "what if's".............but you know, sometimes things happen for a reason. One day you'll be happy and ready to try again. And then it'll be worth it......cause if your like me you'll learn from your experiance. Keep your chin up............things do get easier and better  *Smiles* Live, Love, Laugh......*Smiles*
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2/18/2007 9:02 pm |
Hi Joe,i went through this in 1988  .I do know how you feel.You sound like a very nice guy ,wish you luck for the future.Go forward is all that i can say and take one step at a time.....Lydiaxx
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2/21/2007 2:06 pm |
You should talk about anything you want to in your blog. It’s your blog after all. And you never have to feel as if you have to “entertain” people. I wish I had a magic wand, a potion, a magic spell to take away the pain. But I don't. No one does really. Only time will ease the pain you are going through. All I can offer is a virtual hug. *HUG* x 1000
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2/22/2007 6:43 am |
P.S. No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man. - Heraclitus Ater time heals some of the wounds, you'll find that a whole new wonderous life awaits you. You will be a new man, and the river of life will have changed. I think that sometimes God forces us to go through the darkness so that we can better appreciate the beauty of the new dawn in all it's brightness and glory. I know that it doesn't feel like it now, but it will get better.
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2/22/2007 6:25 pm |
Hey Joe, let me tell you a little of my philosophy, (this is not something I borrowed, it's something that revealed itself to me after my wife left me). Because right now, emotionally speaking, I think you are at a turning point. You know the half empty/half full cup question? Yeah? I'm going to put my spin on it as far as moving on is concerned. Everyone would like their cup to be full all the time right? That is what we aim for in life. At least I think we do. Well, when we first choose a direction in life we look at our cup and fill it with something we think we would like. Starts off the cup is full, we take a sip, drink a little and it tastes good, or nearly does. As we go along, we top it up again. Sometimes our needs and situations change, or what we like is not available, still it gets topped up, not always with the same stuff as we first filled the cup with. We keep drinking and topping up, not really noticing the change as the brew becomes somewhat less identifiable. Sometimes something traumatic occurs, or we just wake up one day and take a big emotional gulp and look at our cup, thinking "what the hell am I drinking" "I don't like this at all" So what do we do? Do we look in the fridge and say, hmm i want some of that and pour it into our half empty/half full cup? Well we could, but we would still end up with a concoction, a brew, just keeping the same old cycle going. I believe that we get to a stage where we need to fully empty our cup, cleanse the emotional dregs, and let go of the old, distasteful concoction. It is then, and only then, that we can fill the cup with what we really want, and not have it loose its taste immediately.... So maybe that is where you are at, looking at your cup wondering what to do with it? Maybe now is time to empty it out and refill it with something new....? My best wishes to you Joe, you will be just fine....
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2/25/2007 2:56 pm |
Thanks brother, it is a bit heady to understand I'm sure, but seriously, this analogy really puts a picture in my mind, and somehow it makes sense. I emptied my cup and that helped me heaps! take care Joe
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